When They Say Nothing At All

Sudoku2
Susanna here, still on deadline and dusting off old posts again, but this time on a subject that's been on my mind a lot while I've been working on this new novella.

Hugh MacPherson, the historical hero of my book A Desperate Fortune, was probably the most stubborn and difficult man I've ever written, taking "strong and silent" to a new extreme for me, sometimes refusing to speak at all when he was in a scene. And even though I'm writing from Hugh's point of view in this novella, and so at least have a better idea of what's going on in his thoughts (though he's still maddeningly non-talkative), I'm finding his actions and gestures are still more important.


Man exhausted 0001So, in keeping with that train of thought, here's an updated version of what I first wrote at the now-resting group blog The Heroine Addicts way back in 2010:

Around that time, over at All About Romance, Leigh put up a post on The Art of Writing Believable Men that I found really interesting, not only because I happen to agree with a lot of her points, but because it set off a discussion of how men can tell you they love you without ever actually saying the words.

When I was interviewed once at the Historical Tapestry blog and asked about my own heroes, I explained,

“I can only draw from men I’ve known in my own life: my grandfathers, my father, and my husband and my friends, all different men, and yet with certain commonalities. If my heroes tend to be quieter men, it’s because the real men I know don’t go emoting all over the place – as a rule, they don’t talk much at all (though to be fair, I talk so much myself it may just be that they can’t get a word in edgewise). They don’t always say the right things, but they’re there, really there, when you need them the most. They’re dependable, trustworthy, decent, intelligent, honourable men with a good sense of humour. So I give these traits to my own leading men.”

I know there are probably all sorts of men out there who have no problem at all in expressing their feelings or saying "I love you", but in my experience men tend to do things, not say them. It's always a challenge for me as a writer to work in those small, quiet gestures that show what the hero is feeling, or wanting to say. Each hero is different, and how he expresses his feelings in action is different, as well.

Again in my experience, the simplest, smallest thing can show the deepest level of emotion. If my husband brought me flowers, I would be suspicious. But sometimes when we're sitting at the table after dinner and he nudges his sudoku puzzle closer to me so that I can help complete it, then I know he loves me.

That's likely why I love the song "When You Say Nothing At All" so much (here's the Alison Krauss version, played over scenes from the movie Dear Frankie, which is in itself a small masterpiece of how to speak without speaking). 

Are your heroes, real-life or otherwise, able to say what they feel? If not, what do they do that translates to "I Love You?" Do you have a favourite scene from a book in which the hero shows the heroine he loves her, without words?

 

100 thoughts on “When They Say Nothing At All”

  1. I’ve had fairly articulate men in my life. But they weren’t very articulate about romance. As you say their actions speak more than their words.
    My husband and I talk about books, about politics, about household and family (and I say 10 words to his one). BUT — we’ve both been battling this virus. He doesn’t say much, but he makes sure I’m not overworking, He does things to make me feel better. That’s much more important than words!
    And he doesn’t bring me flowers, but he sees that my computer is up-to-date and that my kitchen tools are up-to-date. That’s more important to me than flowers would be, so he knows me very well.

    Reply
  2. I’ve had fairly articulate men in my life. But they weren’t very articulate about romance. As you say their actions speak more than their words.
    My husband and I talk about books, about politics, about household and family (and I say 10 words to his one). BUT — we’ve both been battling this virus. He doesn’t say much, but he makes sure I’m not overworking, He does things to make me feel better. That’s much more important than words!
    And he doesn’t bring me flowers, but he sees that my computer is up-to-date and that my kitchen tools are up-to-date. That’s more important to me than flowers would be, so he knows me very well.

    Reply
  3. I’ve had fairly articulate men in my life. But they weren’t very articulate about romance. As you say their actions speak more than their words.
    My husband and I talk about books, about politics, about household and family (and I say 10 words to his one). BUT — we’ve both been battling this virus. He doesn’t say much, but he makes sure I’m not overworking, He does things to make me feel better. That’s much more important than words!
    And he doesn’t bring me flowers, but he sees that my computer is up-to-date and that my kitchen tools are up-to-date. That’s more important to me than flowers would be, so he knows me very well.

    Reply
  4. I’ve had fairly articulate men in my life. But they weren’t very articulate about romance. As you say their actions speak more than their words.
    My husband and I talk about books, about politics, about household and family (and I say 10 words to his one). BUT — we’ve both been battling this virus. He doesn’t say much, but he makes sure I’m not overworking, He does things to make me feel better. That’s much more important than words!
    And he doesn’t bring me flowers, but he sees that my computer is up-to-date and that my kitchen tools are up-to-date. That’s more important to me than flowers would be, so he knows me very well.

    Reply
  5. I’ve had fairly articulate men in my life. But they weren’t very articulate about romance. As you say their actions speak more than their words.
    My husband and I talk about books, about politics, about household and family (and I say 10 words to his one). BUT — we’ve both been battling this virus. He doesn’t say much, but he makes sure I’m not overworking, He does things to make me feel better. That’s much more important than words!
    And he doesn’t bring me flowers, but he sees that my computer is up-to-date and that my kitchen tools are up-to-date. That’s more important to me than flowers would be, so he knows me very well.

    Reply
  6. Your post and the AAR post are so on-point. The romance genre lays so much emphasis on both protagonists saying “I Love You,” with even more emphasis on the hero saying it first. Presumably, it shows his commitment because he’s willing to be vulnerable first. However, it would be wonderful if more books were to indulge in nuance and subtlety and quiet, commonplace gestures to show big emotional responses.

    Reply
  7. Your post and the AAR post are so on-point. The romance genre lays so much emphasis on both protagonists saying “I Love You,” with even more emphasis on the hero saying it first. Presumably, it shows his commitment because he’s willing to be vulnerable first. However, it would be wonderful if more books were to indulge in nuance and subtlety and quiet, commonplace gestures to show big emotional responses.

    Reply
  8. Your post and the AAR post are so on-point. The romance genre lays so much emphasis on both protagonists saying “I Love You,” with even more emphasis on the hero saying it first. Presumably, it shows his commitment because he’s willing to be vulnerable first. However, it would be wonderful if more books were to indulge in nuance and subtlety and quiet, commonplace gestures to show big emotional responses.

    Reply
  9. Your post and the AAR post are so on-point. The romance genre lays so much emphasis on both protagonists saying “I Love You,” with even more emphasis on the hero saying it first. Presumably, it shows his commitment because he’s willing to be vulnerable first. However, it would be wonderful if more books were to indulge in nuance and subtlety and quiet, commonplace gestures to show big emotional responses.

    Reply
  10. Your post and the AAR post are so on-point. The romance genre lays so much emphasis on both protagonists saying “I Love You,” with even more emphasis on the hero saying it first. Presumably, it shows his commitment because he’s willing to be vulnerable first. However, it would be wonderful if more books were to indulge in nuance and subtlety and quiet, commonplace gestures to show big emotional responses.

    Reply
  11. I’m a fan of the show, don’t tell hero in books. This may be due to my own experience with men whose words don’t always line up with their actions. 🙁
    I love words. Words are gorgeous. However, I am more likely to trust a shown “I love you” over a said one. This doesn’t have to be an epic romantic gesture — I adore the small ones that shows the hero understands the heroine. I love the I-will-help-you-do-this-mundane, ordinary-task gesture. I also think dependability is sexy in a hero.
    In fact, I will get seriously annoyed with heroines who insist that the hero must SAY that he loves her. Sweetie, check his actions. He loves you.
    (I may have yelled this at a book once or twice. Maybe.)
    Yes, articulate heroes are lovely. But so are the actions-speak-louder guys.

    Reply
  12. I’m a fan of the show, don’t tell hero in books. This may be due to my own experience with men whose words don’t always line up with their actions. 🙁
    I love words. Words are gorgeous. However, I am more likely to trust a shown “I love you” over a said one. This doesn’t have to be an epic romantic gesture — I adore the small ones that shows the hero understands the heroine. I love the I-will-help-you-do-this-mundane, ordinary-task gesture. I also think dependability is sexy in a hero.
    In fact, I will get seriously annoyed with heroines who insist that the hero must SAY that he loves her. Sweetie, check his actions. He loves you.
    (I may have yelled this at a book once or twice. Maybe.)
    Yes, articulate heroes are lovely. But so are the actions-speak-louder guys.

    Reply
  13. I’m a fan of the show, don’t tell hero in books. This may be due to my own experience with men whose words don’t always line up with their actions. 🙁
    I love words. Words are gorgeous. However, I am more likely to trust a shown “I love you” over a said one. This doesn’t have to be an epic romantic gesture — I adore the small ones that shows the hero understands the heroine. I love the I-will-help-you-do-this-mundane, ordinary-task gesture. I also think dependability is sexy in a hero.
    In fact, I will get seriously annoyed with heroines who insist that the hero must SAY that he loves her. Sweetie, check his actions. He loves you.
    (I may have yelled this at a book once or twice. Maybe.)
    Yes, articulate heroes are lovely. But so are the actions-speak-louder guys.

    Reply
  14. I’m a fan of the show, don’t tell hero in books. This may be due to my own experience with men whose words don’t always line up with their actions. 🙁
    I love words. Words are gorgeous. However, I am more likely to trust a shown “I love you” over a said one. This doesn’t have to be an epic romantic gesture — I adore the small ones that shows the hero understands the heroine. I love the I-will-help-you-do-this-mundane, ordinary-task gesture. I also think dependability is sexy in a hero.
    In fact, I will get seriously annoyed with heroines who insist that the hero must SAY that he loves her. Sweetie, check his actions. He loves you.
    (I may have yelled this at a book once or twice. Maybe.)
    Yes, articulate heroes are lovely. But so are the actions-speak-louder guys.

    Reply
  15. I’m a fan of the show, don’t tell hero in books. This may be due to my own experience with men whose words don’t always line up with their actions. 🙁
    I love words. Words are gorgeous. However, I am more likely to trust a shown “I love you” over a said one. This doesn’t have to be an epic romantic gesture — I adore the small ones that shows the hero understands the heroine. I love the I-will-help-you-do-this-mundane, ordinary-task gesture. I also think dependability is sexy in a hero.
    In fact, I will get seriously annoyed with heroines who insist that the hero must SAY that he loves her. Sweetie, check his actions. He loves you.
    (I may have yelled this at a book once or twice. Maybe.)
    Yes, articulate heroes are lovely. But so are the actions-speak-louder guys.

    Reply
  16. I’m very wordy and say the words all the time. It used to make hubby who’s very UN wordy a bit nervous because he felt that if you said it too much it might lose some magic. As if to say, “who are you trying to convince?” But then I explained that it just gets so overwhelming (my love and emotions) that I HAVE to say it or I’ll explode. He looked at me completely deadpan and said he wouldn’t want me to explode…it would get messy! Snort! But as he’s so unwordy, and very rarely uses the words (upbringing makes it harder) I told him I didn’t care what he said when I said, “I love you”, but he had to respond even with a grunt! So when I say, “Have I told you lately that I love you?” His usual response is, “Not in the last five minutes.”
    But man does he show it! 🙂 He brought home this enormous stuffed elephant and his coworkers asked him what he’d done wrong. He said nothing, he just knew I’d like it. I love it! We work different shifts where some days we barely see each other. But he phones me every day on his lunch break. It’s been 34 years so I think we’re doing okay without the words.

    Reply
  17. I’m very wordy and say the words all the time. It used to make hubby who’s very UN wordy a bit nervous because he felt that if you said it too much it might lose some magic. As if to say, “who are you trying to convince?” But then I explained that it just gets so overwhelming (my love and emotions) that I HAVE to say it or I’ll explode. He looked at me completely deadpan and said he wouldn’t want me to explode…it would get messy! Snort! But as he’s so unwordy, and very rarely uses the words (upbringing makes it harder) I told him I didn’t care what he said when I said, “I love you”, but he had to respond even with a grunt! So when I say, “Have I told you lately that I love you?” His usual response is, “Not in the last five minutes.”
    But man does he show it! 🙂 He brought home this enormous stuffed elephant and his coworkers asked him what he’d done wrong. He said nothing, he just knew I’d like it. I love it! We work different shifts where some days we barely see each other. But he phones me every day on his lunch break. It’s been 34 years so I think we’re doing okay without the words.

    Reply
  18. I’m very wordy and say the words all the time. It used to make hubby who’s very UN wordy a bit nervous because he felt that if you said it too much it might lose some magic. As if to say, “who are you trying to convince?” But then I explained that it just gets so overwhelming (my love and emotions) that I HAVE to say it or I’ll explode. He looked at me completely deadpan and said he wouldn’t want me to explode…it would get messy! Snort! But as he’s so unwordy, and very rarely uses the words (upbringing makes it harder) I told him I didn’t care what he said when I said, “I love you”, but he had to respond even with a grunt! So when I say, “Have I told you lately that I love you?” His usual response is, “Not in the last five minutes.”
    But man does he show it! 🙂 He brought home this enormous stuffed elephant and his coworkers asked him what he’d done wrong. He said nothing, he just knew I’d like it. I love it! We work different shifts where some days we barely see each other. But he phones me every day on his lunch break. It’s been 34 years so I think we’re doing okay without the words.

    Reply
  19. I’m very wordy and say the words all the time. It used to make hubby who’s very UN wordy a bit nervous because he felt that if you said it too much it might lose some magic. As if to say, “who are you trying to convince?” But then I explained that it just gets so overwhelming (my love and emotions) that I HAVE to say it or I’ll explode. He looked at me completely deadpan and said he wouldn’t want me to explode…it would get messy! Snort! But as he’s so unwordy, and very rarely uses the words (upbringing makes it harder) I told him I didn’t care what he said when I said, “I love you”, but he had to respond even with a grunt! So when I say, “Have I told you lately that I love you?” His usual response is, “Not in the last five minutes.”
    But man does he show it! 🙂 He brought home this enormous stuffed elephant and his coworkers asked him what he’d done wrong. He said nothing, he just knew I’d like it. I love it! We work different shifts where some days we barely see each other. But he phones me every day on his lunch break. It’s been 34 years so I think we’re doing okay without the words.

    Reply
  20. I’m very wordy and say the words all the time. It used to make hubby who’s very UN wordy a bit nervous because he felt that if you said it too much it might lose some magic. As if to say, “who are you trying to convince?” But then I explained that it just gets so overwhelming (my love and emotions) that I HAVE to say it or I’ll explode. He looked at me completely deadpan and said he wouldn’t want me to explode…it would get messy! Snort! But as he’s so unwordy, and very rarely uses the words (upbringing makes it harder) I told him I didn’t care what he said when I said, “I love you”, but he had to respond even with a grunt! So when I say, “Have I told you lately that I love you?” His usual response is, “Not in the last five minutes.”
    But man does he show it! 🙂 He brought home this enormous stuffed elephant and his coworkers asked him what he’d done wrong. He said nothing, he just knew I’d like it. I love it! We work different shifts where some days we barely see each other. But he phones me every day on his lunch break. It’s been 34 years so I think we’re doing okay without the words.

    Reply
  21. One of my favorite heroes was very much the strong silent type (Harry in His Captive Lady.) He didn’t say a lot but his actions spoke volumes. But another favorite hero was a very articulate and talkative guy (Gideon In Perfect Rake) — so it’s not so much whether he’s silent or articulate, but what it all means.

    Reply
  22. One of my favorite heroes was very much the strong silent type (Harry in His Captive Lady.) He didn’t say a lot but his actions spoke volumes. But another favorite hero was a very articulate and talkative guy (Gideon In Perfect Rake) — so it’s not so much whether he’s silent or articulate, but what it all means.

    Reply
  23. One of my favorite heroes was very much the strong silent type (Harry in His Captive Lady.) He didn’t say a lot but his actions spoke volumes. But another favorite hero was a very articulate and talkative guy (Gideon In Perfect Rake) — so it’s not so much whether he’s silent or articulate, but what it all means.

    Reply
  24. One of my favorite heroes was very much the strong silent type (Harry in His Captive Lady.) He didn’t say a lot but his actions spoke volumes. But another favorite hero was a very articulate and talkative guy (Gideon In Perfect Rake) — so it’s not so much whether he’s silent or articulate, but what it all means.

    Reply
  25. One of my favorite heroes was very much the strong silent type (Harry in His Captive Lady.) He didn’t say a lot but his actions spoke volumes. But another favorite hero was a very articulate and talkative guy (Gideon In Perfect Rake) — so it’s not so much whether he’s silent or articulate, but what it all means.

    Reply
  26. Agreed. And I’m glad that AAR post survived their move. The link I used back in 2010 no longer worked and I had to go hunting a bit, but thankfully the AAR folks archived all their blog posts when they updated their web site 🙂 It’s a good post, and a thoughtful one.

    Reply
  27. Agreed. And I’m glad that AAR post survived their move. The link I used back in 2010 no longer worked and I had to go hunting a bit, but thankfully the AAR folks archived all their blog posts when they updated their web site 🙂 It’s a good post, and a thoughtful one.

    Reply
  28. Agreed. And I’m glad that AAR post survived their move. The link I used back in 2010 no longer worked and I had to go hunting a bit, but thankfully the AAR folks archived all their blog posts when they updated their web site 🙂 It’s a good post, and a thoughtful one.

    Reply
  29. Agreed. And I’m glad that AAR post survived their move. The link I used back in 2010 no longer worked and I had to go hunting a bit, but thankfully the AAR folks archived all their blog posts when they updated their web site 🙂 It’s a good post, and a thoughtful one.

    Reply
  30. Agreed. And I’m glad that AAR post survived their move. The link I used back in 2010 no longer worked and I had to go hunting a bit, but thankfully the AAR folks archived all their blog posts when they updated their web site 🙂 It’s a good post, and a thoughtful one.

    Reply
  31. Tempest, some of my all-time favourite scenes in films are “ordinary-task gesture” ones.
    Harrison Ford packing Melanie Griffith lunch on her first day at work for her new job, in Working Girl.
    Ben Affleck turning up to wash the dishes and stock the fridge for Jennifer Aniston in He’s Just Not That Into You, when she’s been running herself ragged taking care of her dad and no one else has been helping her.
    Ewan McGregor bringing Emily Blunt a sandwich in Salmon Fishing in the Yemen.
    THOSE are the moments that make my heart melt.

    Reply
  32. Tempest, some of my all-time favourite scenes in films are “ordinary-task gesture” ones.
    Harrison Ford packing Melanie Griffith lunch on her first day at work for her new job, in Working Girl.
    Ben Affleck turning up to wash the dishes and stock the fridge for Jennifer Aniston in He’s Just Not That Into You, when she’s been running herself ragged taking care of her dad and no one else has been helping her.
    Ewan McGregor bringing Emily Blunt a sandwich in Salmon Fishing in the Yemen.
    THOSE are the moments that make my heart melt.

    Reply
  33. Tempest, some of my all-time favourite scenes in films are “ordinary-task gesture” ones.
    Harrison Ford packing Melanie Griffith lunch on her first day at work for her new job, in Working Girl.
    Ben Affleck turning up to wash the dishes and stock the fridge for Jennifer Aniston in He’s Just Not That Into You, when she’s been running herself ragged taking care of her dad and no one else has been helping her.
    Ewan McGregor bringing Emily Blunt a sandwich in Salmon Fishing in the Yemen.
    THOSE are the moments that make my heart melt.

    Reply
  34. Tempest, some of my all-time favourite scenes in films are “ordinary-task gesture” ones.
    Harrison Ford packing Melanie Griffith lunch on her first day at work for her new job, in Working Girl.
    Ben Affleck turning up to wash the dishes and stock the fridge for Jennifer Aniston in He’s Just Not That Into You, when she’s been running herself ragged taking care of her dad and no one else has been helping her.
    Ewan McGregor bringing Emily Blunt a sandwich in Salmon Fishing in the Yemen.
    THOSE are the moments that make my heart melt.

    Reply
  35. Tempest, some of my all-time favourite scenes in films are “ordinary-task gesture” ones.
    Harrison Ford packing Melanie Griffith lunch on her first day at work for her new job, in Working Girl.
    Ben Affleck turning up to wash the dishes and stock the fridge for Jennifer Aniston in He’s Just Not That Into You, when she’s been running herself ragged taking care of her dad and no one else has been helping her.
    Ewan McGregor bringing Emily Blunt a sandwich in Salmon Fishing in the Yemen.
    THOSE are the moments that make my heart melt.

    Reply
  36. Anne, I always think it’s fun waiting to see what my heroes are going to end up like. Most of the time they’re relatively quiet, but every now and then I get a chatty one, like Edmund, and I have to say I find that quite refreshing 🙂

    Reply
  37. Anne, I always think it’s fun waiting to see what my heroes are going to end up like. Most of the time they’re relatively quiet, but every now and then I get a chatty one, like Edmund, and I have to say I find that quite refreshing 🙂

    Reply
  38. Anne, I always think it’s fun waiting to see what my heroes are going to end up like. Most of the time they’re relatively quiet, but every now and then I get a chatty one, like Edmund, and I have to say I find that quite refreshing 🙂

    Reply
  39. Anne, I always think it’s fun waiting to see what my heroes are going to end up like. Most of the time they’re relatively quiet, but every now and then I get a chatty one, like Edmund, and I have to say I find that quite refreshing 🙂

    Reply
  40. Anne, I always think it’s fun waiting to see what my heroes are going to end up like. Most of the time they’re relatively quiet, but every now and then I get a chatty one, like Edmund, and I have to say I find that quite refreshing 🙂

    Reply
  41. Patricia Rice wrote Will in No Perfect Magic. He is not talkative but his abilities mean that he hears. I thought he would be both a difficult man to love but also a joy to love.
    One of the reasons I love books about relationships and romance, I have not had the luxury of finding a good man, but y’all continue to remind me they can exist.
    Whether they are talkers or silent, they can be good men.
    I thank you.

    Reply
  42. Patricia Rice wrote Will in No Perfect Magic. He is not talkative but his abilities mean that he hears. I thought he would be both a difficult man to love but also a joy to love.
    One of the reasons I love books about relationships and romance, I have not had the luxury of finding a good man, but y’all continue to remind me they can exist.
    Whether they are talkers or silent, they can be good men.
    I thank you.

    Reply
  43. Patricia Rice wrote Will in No Perfect Magic. He is not talkative but his abilities mean that he hears. I thought he would be both a difficult man to love but also a joy to love.
    One of the reasons I love books about relationships and romance, I have not had the luxury of finding a good man, but y’all continue to remind me they can exist.
    Whether they are talkers or silent, they can be good men.
    I thank you.

    Reply
  44. Patricia Rice wrote Will in No Perfect Magic. He is not talkative but his abilities mean that he hears. I thought he would be both a difficult man to love but also a joy to love.
    One of the reasons I love books about relationships and romance, I have not had the luxury of finding a good man, but y’all continue to remind me they can exist.
    Whether they are talkers or silent, they can be good men.
    I thank you.

    Reply
  45. Patricia Rice wrote Will in No Perfect Magic. He is not talkative but his abilities mean that he hears. I thought he would be both a difficult man to love but also a joy to love.
    One of the reasons I love books about relationships and romance, I have not had the luxury of finding a good man, but y’all continue to remind me they can exist.
    Whether they are talkers or silent, they can be good men.
    I thank you.

    Reply
  46. I am reminded of the older spy hero in one of my favorites of yours, Every Secret Thing. Wish I could remember his name, because just thinking about him is making me want to burst into tears right now! But talk about showing love by doing (or not doing) rather than saying!
    I twice married talkers, but I suspect if I’d taken the time to find a quiet man, I might still be married.
    In any case, I save great writing craft articles to share with authors, and this one’s going in that file.
    Thank you, Faith

    Reply
  47. I am reminded of the older spy hero in one of my favorites of yours, Every Secret Thing. Wish I could remember his name, because just thinking about him is making me want to burst into tears right now! But talk about showing love by doing (or not doing) rather than saying!
    I twice married talkers, but I suspect if I’d taken the time to find a quiet man, I might still be married.
    In any case, I save great writing craft articles to share with authors, and this one’s going in that file.
    Thank you, Faith

    Reply
  48. I am reminded of the older spy hero in one of my favorites of yours, Every Secret Thing. Wish I could remember his name, because just thinking about him is making me want to burst into tears right now! But talk about showing love by doing (or not doing) rather than saying!
    I twice married talkers, but I suspect if I’d taken the time to find a quiet man, I might still be married.
    In any case, I save great writing craft articles to share with authors, and this one’s going in that file.
    Thank you, Faith

    Reply
  49. I am reminded of the older spy hero in one of my favorites of yours, Every Secret Thing. Wish I could remember his name, because just thinking about him is making me want to burst into tears right now! But talk about showing love by doing (or not doing) rather than saying!
    I twice married talkers, but I suspect if I’d taken the time to find a quiet man, I might still be married.
    In any case, I save great writing craft articles to share with authors, and this one’s going in that file.
    Thank you, Faith

    Reply
  50. I am reminded of the older spy hero in one of my favorites of yours, Every Secret Thing. Wish I could remember his name, because just thinking about him is making me want to burst into tears right now! But talk about showing love by doing (or not doing) rather than saying!
    I twice married talkers, but I suspect if I’d taken the time to find a quiet man, I might still be married.
    In any case, I save great writing craft articles to share with authors, and this one’s going in that file.
    Thank you, Faith

    Reply
  51. My husband is the romantic type. He can say it any time. Unlike me who finds it hard to show my feelings.
    He’s also thoughtful, (when he remembers, he has a dreadful memory). I’ve been having a hard time lately and when I got up this morning there was a lovely breakfast waiting for me. Little things like that mean a lot to me.
    I can’t think of any heroes in books that remind me of this but I’m sure there are many I liked.

    Reply
  52. My husband is the romantic type. He can say it any time. Unlike me who finds it hard to show my feelings.
    He’s also thoughtful, (when he remembers, he has a dreadful memory). I’ve been having a hard time lately and when I got up this morning there was a lovely breakfast waiting for me. Little things like that mean a lot to me.
    I can’t think of any heroes in books that remind me of this but I’m sure there are many I liked.

    Reply
  53. My husband is the romantic type. He can say it any time. Unlike me who finds it hard to show my feelings.
    He’s also thoughtful, (when he remembers, he has a dreadful memory). I’ve been having a hard time lately and when I got up this morning there was a lovely breakfast waiting for me. Little things like that mean a lot to me.
    I can’t think of any heroes in books that remind me of this but I’m sure there are many I liked.

    Reply
  54. My husband is the romantic type. He can say it any time. Unlike me who finds it hard to show my feelings.
    He’s also thoughtful, (when he remembers, he has a dreadful memory). I’ve been having a hard time lately and when I got up this morning there was a lovely breakfast waiting for me. Little things like that mean a lot to me.
    I can’t think of any heroes in books that remind me of this but I’m sure there are many I liked.

    Reply
  55. My husband is the romantic type. He can say it any time. Unlike me who finds it hard to show my feelings.
    He’s also thoughtful, (when he remembers, he has a dreadful memory). I’ve been having a hard time lately and when I got up this morning there was a lovely breakfast waiting for me. Little things like that mean a lot to me.
    I can’t think of any heroes in books that remind me of this but I’m sure there are many I liked.

    Reply
  56. In “The Madness of Lord Ian Mackenzie” Lord Ian is not much of a talker, but there’s a scene where he gives the heroine one of his beloved antique Chinese vases.
    And thank you for the reminder to appreciate the men in our lives, who show instead of tell!

    Reply
  57. In “The Madness of Lord Ian Mackenzie” Lord Ian is not much of a talker, but there’s a scene where he gives the heroine one of his beloved antique Chinese vases.
    And thank you for the reminder to appreciate the men in our lives, who show instead of tell!

    Reply
  58. In “The Madness of Lord Ian Mackenzie” Lord Ian is not much of a talker, but there’s a scene where he gives the heroine one of his beloved antique Chinese vases.
    And thank you for the reminder to appreciate the men in our lives, who show instead of tell!

    Reply
  59. In “The Madness of Lord Ian Mackenzie” Lord Ian is not much of a talker, but there’s a scene where he gives the heroine one of his beloved antique Chinese vases.
    And thank you for the reminder to appreciate the men in our lives, who show instead of tell!

    Reply
  60. In “The Madness of Lord Ian Mackenzie” Lord Ian is not much of a talker, but there’s a scene where he gives the heroine one of his beloved antique Chinese vases.
    And thank you for the reminder to appreciate the men in our lives, who show instead of tell!

    Reply
  61. I’m extraordinarily lucky in that my husband says it AND shows it in innumerable ways, but I like heroes who are honest, so they can be wordy or not, as long as their love is true. Dead Again is a romantic suspense novel by an indie author, Tracey Cooper Posey, that I read years ago but have never forgotten. The words “I love you” are never uttered by the hero or heroine, yet it was one of the most memorable “romances” I’ve ever read. Thanks for the thought-provoking post, Susanna. Now I’ve got to go hunt down those blog archives!

    Reply
  62. I’m extraordinarily lucky in that my husband says it AND shows it in innumerable ways, but I like heroes who are honest, so they can be wordy or not, as long as their love is true. Dead Again is a romantic suspense novel by an indie author, Tracey Cooper Posey, that I read years ago but have never forgotten. The words “I love you” are never uttered by the hero or heroine, yet it was one of the most memorable “romances” I’ve ever read. Thanks for the thought-provoking post, Susanna. Now I’ve got to go hunt down those blog archives!

    Reply
  63. I’m extraordinarily lucky in that my husband says it AND shows it in innumerable ways, but I like heroes who are honest, so they can be wordy or not, as long as their love is true. Dead Again is a romantic suspense novel by an indie author, Tracey Cooper Posey, that I read years ago but have never forgotten. The words “I love you” are never uttered by the hero or heroine, yet it was one of the most memorable “romances” I’ve ever read. Thanks for the thought-provoking post, Susanna. Now I’ve got to go hunt down those blog archives!

    Reply
  64. I’m extraordinarily lucky in that my husband says it AND shows it in innumerable ways, but I like heroes who are honest, so they can be wordy or not, as long as their love is true. Dead Again is a romantic suspense novel by an indie author, Tracey Cooper Posey, that I read years ago but have never forgotten. The words “I love you” are never uttered by the hero or heroine, yet it was one of the most memorable “romances” I’ve ever read. Thanks for the thought-provoking post, Susanna. Now I’ve got to go hunt down those blog archives!

    Reply
  65. I’m extraordinarily lucky in that my husband says it AND shows it in innumerable ways, but I like heroes who are honest, so they can be wordy or not, as long as their love is true. Dead Again is a romantic suspense novel by an indie author, Tracey Cooper Posey, that I read years ago but have never forgotten. The words “I love you” are never uttered by the hero or heroine, yet it was one of the most memorable “romances” I’ve ever read. Thanks for the thought-provoking post, Susanna. Now I’ve got to go hunt down those blog archives!

    Reply
  66. I just have to laugh at the image of this big tough man smuggly walking through the store with this huge stuffed elephant under his arm. Makes me melt every time I think of it. And he hates Valentines Day. Says we shouldn’t just spoil one another on one day a year, but every day of the year. Definitely a show don’t tell kind of man.
    Oh! I just watched Dear Frankie for the first time and loved it. I loved the twist at the end! Thank you for the video with the song!

    Reply
  67. I just have to laugh at the image of this big tough man smuggly walking through the store with this huge stuffed elephant under his arm. Makes me melt every time I think of it. And he hates Valentines Day. Says we shouldn’t just spoil one another on one day a year, but every day of the year. Definitely a show don’t tell kind of man.
    Oh! I just watched Dear Frankie for the first time and loved it. I loved the twist at the end! Thank you for the video with the song!

    Reply
  68. I just have to laugh at the image of this big tough man smuggly walking through the store with this huge stuffed elephant under his arm. Makes me melt every time I think of it. And he hates Valentines Day. Says we shouldn’t just spoil one another on one day a year, but every day of the year. Definitely a show don’t tell kind of man.
    Oh! I just watched Dear Frankie for the first time and loved it. I loved the twist at the end! Thank you for the video with the song!

    Reply
  69. I just have to laugh at the image of this big tough man smuggly walking through the store with this huge stuffed elephant under his arm. Makes me melt every time I think of it. And he hates Valentines Day. Says we shouldn’t just spoil one another on one day a year, but every day of the year. Definitely a show don’t tell kind of man.
    Oh! I just watched Dear Frankie for the first time and loved it. I loved the twist at the end! Thank you for the video with the song!

    Reply
  70. I just have to laugh at the image of this big tough man smuggly walking through the store with this huge stuffed elephant under his arm. Makes me melt every time I think of it. And he hates Valentines Day. Says we shouldn’t just spoil one another on one day a year, but every day of the year. Definitely a show don’t tell kind of man.
    Oh! I just watched Dear Frankie for the first time and loved it. I loved the twist at the end! Thank you for the video with the song!

    Reply
  71. As a reader I am fascinated by this discussion on how characters talk to you. You as authors have such a gift it is truly amazing. Thank you for your insight!

    Reply
  72. As a reader I am fascinated by this discussion on how characters talk to you. You as authors have such a gift it is truly amazing. Thank you for your insight!

    Reply
  73. As a reader I am fascinated by this discussion on how characters talk to you. You as authors have such a gift it is truly amazing. Thank you for your insight!

    Reply
  74. As a reader I am fascinated by this discussion on how characters talk to you. You as authors have such a gift it is truly amazing. Thank you for your insight!

    Reply
  75. As a reader I am fascinated by this discussion on how characters talk to you. You as authors have such a gift it is truly amazing. Thank you for your insight!

    Reply

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