Sex in the Regency

Ubnew Jo here, back home in Devon after a brief jaunt to London for the Romantic Novelists Association's Regency Readers' Day. Wench Nicola was there, too. I don't have a head count, but I think over 100 people attended and a great time was had by all. The programme contained some panels sessions, a talk by Honorary Wench Jennifer Kloester on her biography of Georgette Heyer (if you missed her visit to the Word Wenches a short while ago, it's here), and some active sessions on Regency dance — always fun — and Regency parlour games.

There were also a number of people in costume, including some handsome soldiers.

Rnasoldier

I moderated the panel on Sex and the Georgians, which was rollicking good fun. We started with a short talk about the Celestial Bed. You can read more about it here.

Graham was a late 18th century experimenter with electricity for healing purposes. It's tagged quackery, but electricity continued to be used in medicine throughout the 19th century, and it might sometimes have been effective. After all, we now use TNS — Trans-neural-stimulation — electricity for pain.

"The cenCchbukterpiece of the Temple of Health was the 'Celestial Bed,' which was reserved for those able to afford the fee of £50 a night. Graham advertised that anyone who rented the bed for the night would be "blessed with progeny." Sterility or impotence would be cured." (From the linked article above.)

  There's a review of a book on the subject which gives more detail.

 

The panel — Elizabeth Moss, Jan Jones, Annie Burrows, and me — discussed our own take on the reality of sex in the Georgian era, and the way we portray it in romance novels. New tiger cover

The Georgian period is long, taking us from the tail end of the Stuarts and Restoration mores almost to the Victorian period with its hypocricritical prudishness, so today let's only look at the Regency — 1811 – 18203

Want to have a go at these questions?

When a novel's heroine is a spinster, how much might she know about the male body, and about sexual intercourse, on her wedding night?

How much might she know after it? LOL!

How much might she know about pregnancy — how it happens and the risks of different sexual acts?

Janjones How much might she know about contraception?

Is it believable to have women in Regency-set romances driven beyond reason by sexual desire?

Do you have a strong preference between novels with explicit sex and those without it?

If the novel ends before the characters make love, is that okay, or do you feel cheated?

If the characters make love in the book, but the author "closes the bedroom door" is that okay, or annoying?

I'll answer that one. For me, infuriating! I don't mind "sweet" books at all, as long as the story ends before they make love, but if they do, I want to continue the same deep connection I've experienced during the rest of the story. I don't necessarily need detail, but I want to understand what happened, because it isn't a given.

 

(Picture here is the sort a young lady might well see around the stately home.)6a00d8341c84c753ef00e54f1375cc8833-800wi.jpg

Sometimes people will say that we don't need to go there because "everyone knows what happens." But that simply isn't true. Sex, particularly the first sex a couple has, is highly revealing about them and their relationships. Sex is also unpredictable — sometimes it just doesn't work out, and how do they respond then? Sometimes it turns hilariously funny. Again, how do they respond to that. Sometimes it's complicated, sometimes simple. And so it goes. I want to know.

1374591169 When I was a teenager reading Georgette Heyer I often continued the book in my mind, especially to the marriage bed. Before I had practical experience to bring to that I could still spin it out pretty well because sexuality is hard-wired in our brains. For2011

So, have a go at the questions and there'll be a pick of my booklist prize to a random pick of the most entertaining or illuminating comments.

Jo

 

(Statue she might see around the house.)

 

 

 

170 thoughts on “Sex in the Regency”

  1. Regency Day sounds like a great deal of fun. I’m so envious! We need more pics!
    I won’t get into the sex questions because I believe people then are no different from today in such basic matters. Level of education, curiosity, and intelligence will always affect knowledge, and if sex is hard-wired, some people have more wiring than others. “G”

    Reply
  2. Regency Day sounds like a great deal of fun. I’m so envious! We need more pics!
    I won’t get into the sex questions because I believe people then are no different from today in such basic matters. Level of education, curiosity, and intelligence will always affect knowledge, and if sex is hard-wired, some people have more wiring than others. “G”

    Reply
  3. Regency Day sounds like a great deal of fun. I’m so envious! We need more pics!
    I won’t get into the sex questions because I believe people then are no different from today in such basic matters. Level of education, curiosity, and intelligence will always affect knowledge, and if sex is hard-wired, some people have more wiring than others. “G”

    Reply
  4. Regency Day sounds like a great deal of fun. I’m so envious! We need more pics!
    I won’t get into the sex questions because I believe people then are no different from today in such basic matters. Level of education, curiosity, and intelligence will always affect knowledge, and if sex is hard-wired, some people have more wiring than others. “G”

    Reply
  5. Regency Day sounds like a great deal of fun. I’m so envious! We need more pics!
    I won’t get into the sex questions because I believe people then are no different from today in such basic matters. Level of education, curiosity, and intelligence will always affect knowledge, and if sex is hard-wired, some people have more wiring than others. “G”

    Reply
  6. I wish I’d been there! I’m sure it was fabulous great fun.
    I suspect that the level of sexual knowledge varied enormously, but often weighted toward ignorance since they didn’t have all these wonderful mass media visions of sex shoved in their faces all the time. *G* Even when I started college, the range of sexual knowledge, from total ignorance to substantial experience, was vast. I think there is somewhat less ignorance now.

    Reply
  7. I wish I’d been there! I’m sure it was fabulous great fun.
    I suspect that the level of sexual knowledge varied enormously, but often weighted toward ignorance since they didn’t have all these wonderful mass media visions of sex shoved in their faces all the time. *G* Even when I started college, the range of sexual knowledge, from total ignorance to substantial experience, was vast. I think there is somewhat less ignorance now.

    Reply
  8. I wish I’d been there! I’m sure it was fabulous great fun.
    I suspect that the level of sexual knowledge varied enormously, but often weighted toward ignorance since they didn’t have all these wonderful mass media visions of sex shoved in their faces all the time. *G* Even when I started college, the range of sexual knowledge, from total ignorance to substantial experience, was vast. I think there is somewhat less ignorance now.

    Reply
  9. I wish I’d been there! I’m sure it was fabulous great fun.
    I suspect that the level of sexual knowledge varied enormously, but often weighted toward ignorance since they didn’t have all these wonderful mass media visions of sex shoved in their faces all the time. *G* Even when I started college, the range of sexual knowledge, from total ignorance to substantial experience, was vast. I think there is somewhat less ignorance now.

    Reply
  10. I wish I’d been there! I’m sure it was fabulous great fun.
    I suspect that the level of sexual knowledge varied enormously, but often weighted toward ignorance since they didn’t have all these wonderful mass media visions of sex shoved in their faces all the time. *G* Even when I started college, the range of sexual knowledge, from total ignorance to substantial experience, was vast. I think there is somewhat less ignorance now.

    Reply
  11. I love romance novels with any kind of sex.Just don’t close the bedroom door. If there’s no sex I do feel cheated. I don’t know what spinsters knew back then, but when I received my first “french kiss”, I was totally shocked. I was 18 in 1970 and nobody told me about that.I was so grossed out!!! I got used to it eventually.

    Reply
  12. I love romance novels with any kind of sex.Just don’t close the bedroom door. If there’s no sex I do feel cheated. I don’t know what spinsters knew back then, but when I received my first “french kiss”, I was totally shocked. I was 18 in 1970 and nobody told me about that.I was so grossed out!!! I got used to it eventually.

    Reply
  13. I love romance novels with any kind of sex.Just don’t close the bedroom door. If there’s no sex I do feel cheated. I don’t know what spinsters knew back then, but when I received my first “french kiss”, I was totally shocked. I was 18 in 1970 and nobody told me about that.I was so grossed out!!! I got used to it eventually.

    Reply
  14. I love romance novels with any kind of sex.Just don’t close the bedroom door. If there’s no sex I do feel cheated. I don’t know what spinsters knew back then, but when I received my first “french kiss”, I was totally shocked. I was 18 in 1970 and nobody told me about that.I was so grossed out!!! I got used to it eventually.

    Reply
  15. I love romance novels with any kind of sex.Just don’t close the bedroom door. If there’s no sex I do feel cheated. I don’t know what spinsters knew back then, but when I received my first “french kiss”, I was totally shocked. I was 18 in 1970 and nobody told me about that.I was so grossed out!!! I got used to it eventually.

    Reply
  16. I don’t mind a little sex in a book, and like you said, the first time they do it, I’m fine with a little more descriptions. But, there have been a few books lately that just go on and on – more than a handful of sessions – in one book. When it’s that much, I just skip over those parts and if there are too many, it’s distracting to the story. For the 2nd and 3rd time they do “it” – it’s ok to sum it up in a paragraph. 🙂

    Reply
  17. I don’t mind a little sex in a book, and like you said, the first time they do it, I’m fine with a little more descriptions. But, there have been a few books lately that just go on and on – more than a handful of sessions – in one book. When it’s that much, I just skip over those parts and if there are too many, it’s distracting to the story. For the 2nd and 3rd time they do “it” – it’s ok to sum it up in a paragraph. 🙂

    Reply
  18. I don’t mind a little sex in a book, and like you said, the first time they do it, I’m fine with a little more descriptions. But, there have been a few books lately that just go on and on – more than a handful of sessions – in one book. When it’s that much, I just skip over those parts and if there are too many, it’s distracting to the story. For the 2nd and 3rd time they do “it” – it’s ok to sum it up in a paragraph. 🙂

    Reply
  19. I don’t mind a little sex in a book, and like you said, the first time they do it, I’m fine with a little more descriptions. But, there have been a few books lately that just go on and on – more than a handful of sessions – in one book. When it’s that much, I just skip over those parts and if there are too many, it’s distracting to the story. For the 2nd and 3rd time they do “it” – it’s ok to sum it up in a paragraph. 🙂

    Reply
  20. I don’t mind a little sex in a book, and like you said, the first time they do it, I’m fine with a little more descriptions. But, there have been a few books lately that just go on and on – more than a handful of sessions – in one book. When it’s that much, I just skip over those parts and if there are too many, it’s distracting to the story. For the 2nd and 3rd time they do “it” – it’s ok to sum it up in a paragraph. 🙂

    Reply
  21. Susan K – same for me with the fr. kiss. what i think is prob most realistic is when the hero has more experience than the woman. but if he learned that sex was forbidden or wrong which then clashed with one’s own powerful desires, he could be a difficult partner for someone innocent.

    Reply
  22. Susan K – same for me with the fr. kiss. what i think is prob most realistic is when the hero has more experience than the woman. but if he learned that sex was forbidden or wrong which then clashed with one’s own powerful desires, he could be a difficult partner for someone innocent.

    Reply
  23. Susan K – same for me with the fr. kiss. what i think is prob most realistic is when the hero has more experience than the woman. but if he learned that sex was forbidden or wrong which then clashed with one’s own powerful desires, he could be a difficult partner for someone innocent.

    Reply
  24. Susan K – same for me with the fr. kiss. what i think is prob most realistic is when the hero has more experience than the woman. but if he learned that sex was forbidden or wrong which then clashed with one’s own powerful desires, he could be a difficult partner for someone innocent.

    Reply
  25. Susan K – same for me with the fr. kiss. what i think is prob most realistic is when the hero has more experience than the woman. but if he learned that sex was forbidden or wrong which then clashed with one’s own powerful desires, he could be a difficult partner for someone innocent.

    Reply
  26. Jo here. I agree that sexual knowledge would vary a lot, but because most romance heroines are country bred — even their parents would only spend a few months in London, if that — they’d have a lot of general knowledge. They’d see animals copulating, including a ram working a field of sheep, or a stallion raring to go. They’d hear gossip, some of it frank, and I’m sure that like girls and boys all through history they shared what they knew, so it only needs one knowing one….
    However, I do think that not having action input from screens as we all do now, there would be a very exploratory aspect to a first kiss, pleasant or unpleasant.
    Jo

    Reply
  27. Jo here. I agree that sexual knowledge would vary a lot, but because most romance heroines are country bred — even their parents would only spend a few months in London, if that — they’d have a lot of general knowledge. They’d see animals copulating, including a ram working a field of sheep, or a stallion raring to go. They’d hear gossip, some of it frank, and I’m sure that like girls and boys all through history they shared what they knew, so it only needs one knowing one….
    However, I do think that not having action input from screens as we all do now, there would be a very exploratory aspect to a first kiss, pleasant or unpleasant.
    Jo

    Reply
  28. Jo here. I agree that sexual knowledge would vary a lot, but because most romance heroines are country bred — even their parents would only spend a few months in London, if that — they’d have a lot of general knowledge. They’d see animals copulating, including a ram working a field of sheep, or a stallion raring to go. They’d hear gossip, some of it frank, and I’m sure that like girls and boys all through history they shared what they knew, so it only needs one knowing one….
    However, I do think that not having action input from screens as we all do now, there would be a very exploratory aspect to a first kiss, pleasant or unpleasant.
    Jo

    Reply
  29. Jo here. I agree that sexual knowledge would vary a lot, but because most romance heroines are country bred — even their parents would only spend a few months in London, if that — they’d have a lot of general knowledge. They’d see animals copulating, including a ram working a field of sheep, or a stallion raring to go. They’d hear gossip, some of it frank, and I’m sure that like girls and boys all through history they shared what they knew, so it only needs one knowing one….
    However, I do think that not having action input from screens as we all do now, there would be a very exploratory aspect to a first kiss, pleasant or unpleasant.
    Jo

    Reply
  30. Jo here. I agree that sexual knowledge would vary a lot, but because most romance heroines are country bred — even their parents would only spend a few months in London, if that — they’d have a lot of general knowledge. They’d see animals copulating, including a ram working a field of sheep, or a stallion raring to go. They’d hear gossip, some of it frank, and I’m sure that like girls and boys all through history they shared what they knew, so it only needs one knowing one….
    However, I do think that not having action input from screens as we all do now, there would be a very exploratory aspect to a first kiss, pleasant or unpleasant.
    Jo

    Reply
  31. Re French kissing etc, I think that’s where the skilled hero is so delightful. I assume he’d know better than to just plunge in!
    Miss Molly, I agree about books with too many sex scenes. Each to their own, but too many of any sort of scenes makes for a boring book, IMO.
    Too many food scenes, too many chase scenes, too many witty banter scenes. It really doesn’t matter, there should be both progression and variety.
    Jo

    Reply
  32. Re French kissing etc, I think that’s where the skilled hero is so delightful. I assume he’d know better than to just plunge in!
    Miss Molly, I agree about books with too many sex scenes. Each to their own, but too many of any sort of scenes makes for a boring book, IMO.
    Too many food scenes, too many chase scenes, too many witty banter scenes. It really doesn’t matter, there should be both progression and variety.
    Jo

    Reply
  33. Re French kissing etc, I think that’s where the skilled hero is so delightful. I assume he’d know better than to just plunge in!
    Miss Molly, I agree about books with too many sex scenes. Each to their own, but too many of any sort of scenes makes for a boring book, IMO.
    Too many food scenes, too many chase scenes, too many witty banter scenes. It really doesn’t matter, there should be both progression and variety.
    Jo

    Reply
  34. Re French kissing etc, I think that’s where the skilled hero is so delightful. I assume he’d know better than to just plunge in!
    Miss Molly, I agree about books with too many sex scenes. Each to their own, but too many of any sort of scenes makes for a boring book, IMO.
    Too many food scenes, too many chase scenes, too many witty banter scenes. It really doesn’t matter, there should be both progression and variety.
    Jo

    Reply
  35. Re French kissing etc, I think that’s where the skilled hero is so delightful. I assume he’d know better than to just plunge in!
    Miss Molly, I agree about books with too many sex scenes. Each to their own, but too many of any sort of scenes makes for a boring book, IMO.
    Too many food scenes, too many chase scenes, too many witty banter scenes. It really doesn’t matter, there should be both progression and variety.
    Jo

    Reply
  36. I’ve often wondered how it is that all the heros or gorgeous villains are always so knowledgeable when it comes to sex. If it is through practice, it leaves me thinking how lucky they were to have slipped through the VD net. I’m not sure they took the trouble to wear a sheath each time and quite honestly, it would take the edge off the scene if he stopped while we had the description of how he put it on before returning to the ecstasiating virgin! I do like to know what goes on between the couples. We all have some of the voyeur in us and the romantic novel is a bona fida method for exercising it. Perhaps more real voyeurs ought to read Regency Romances! Anyway, times have certainly advanced since Georgette Heyer, whom my mother started me reading years ago. Believe it or not, at 89 she now loves the modern ones as long as one doesn’t say ‘cock’ or ‘prick’. All the rest passes. So please don’t stop. The heros and the heroines don’t!

    Reply
  37. I’ve often wondered how it is that all the heros or gorgeous villains are always so knowledgeable when it comes to sex. If it is through practice, it leaves me thinking how lucky they were to have slipped through the VD net. I’m not sure they took the trouble to wear a sheath each time and quite honestly, it would take the edge off the scene if he stopped while we had the description of how he put it on before returning to the ecstasiating virgin! I do like to know what goes on between the couples. We all have some of the voyeur in us and the romantic novel is a bona fida method for exercising it. Perhaps more real voyeurs ought to read Regency Romances! Anyway, times have certainly advanced since Georgette Heyer, whom my mother started me reading years ago. Believe it or not, at 89 she now loves the modern ones as long as one doesn’t say ‘cock’ or ‘prick’. All the rest passes. So please don’t stop. The heros and the heroines don’t!

    Reply
  38. I’ve often wondered how it is that all the heros or gorgeous villains are always so knowledgeable when it comes to sex. If it is through practice, it leaves me thinking how lucky they were to have slipped through the VD net. I’m not sure they took the trouble to wear a sheath each time and quite honestly, it would take the edge off the scene if he stopped while we had the description of how he put it on before returning to the ecstasiating virgin! I do like to know what goes on between the couples. We all have some of the voyeur in us and the romantic novel is a bona fida method for exercising it. Perhaps more real voyeurs ought to read Regency Romances! Anyway, times have certainly advanced since Georgette Heyer, whom my mother started me reading years ago. Believe it or not, at 89 she now loves the modern ones as long as one doesn’t say ‘cock’ or ‘prick’. All the rest passes. So please don’t stop. The heros and the heroines don’t!

    Reply
  39. I’ve often wondered how it is that all the heros or gorgeous villains are always so knowledgeable when it comes to sex. If it is through practice, it leaves me thinking how lucky they were to have slipped through the VD net. I’m not sure they took the trouble to wear a sheath each time and quite honestly, it would take the edge off the scene if he stopped while we had the description of how he put it on before returning to the ecstasiating virgin! I do like to know what goes on between the couples. We all have some of the voyeur in us and the romantic novel is a bona fida method for exercising it. Perhaps more real voyeurs ought to read Regency Romances! Anyway, times have certainly advanced since Georgette Heyer, whom my mother started me reading years ago. Believe it or not, at 89 she now loves the modern ones as long as one doesn’t say ‘cock’ or ‘prick’. All the rest passes. So please don’t stop. The heros and the heroines don’t!

    Reply
  40. I’ve often wondered how it is that all the heros or gorgeous villains are always so knowledgeable when it comes to sex. If it is through practice, it leaves me thinking how lucky they were to have slipped through the VD net. I’m not sure they took the trouble to wear a sheath each time and quite honestly, it would take the edge off the scene if he stopped while we had the description of how he put it on before returning to the ecstasiating virgin! I do like to know what goes on between the couples. We all have some of the voyeur in us and the romantic novel is a bona fida method for exercising it. Perhaps more real voyeurs ought to read Regency Romances! Anyway, times have certainly advanced since Georgette Heyer, whom my mother started me reading years ago. Believe it or not, at 89 she now loves the modern ones as long as one doesn’t say ‘cock’ or ‘prick’. All the rest passes. So please don’t stop. The heros and the heroines don’t!

    Reply
  41. When a novel’s heroine is a spinster, how much might she know about the male body, and about sexual intercourse, on her wedding night? VERY LITTLE. Logically I’d say she’d think the male body looks like a version of her, to a degree; or like a Greek statue…and then she can be confused by how much bigger his member looks than a statue. Or he’s hairier. There are authors who get around his by having a hero strip in a field unawares, or a real bookworm who finds all sorts of curious books, which I believe existed, but not as rampantly available as they seem to be for all those spinsters in that time period. (See, there comes a point where I think I’ve read too many novels. I’m so jaded.)
    How much might she know after it? PERHAPS EVEN LESS. *LOL* I vote for the “botched” sexual deflowering, and it progressively gets better. Heroines who automatically want to “kiss him there” without a minute’s question of hygiene or “ewww” leave me frustrated. I mean, I’m all about it now—but when I first had sex, I was a little less game. I believe in the power of persuasion.
    How much might she know about pregnancy — how it happens and the risks of different sexual acts? Hmm. This one I might rate a little more likely. There would be young women, maids, et al, who ended up pregnant who weren’t married. I think they would be excellent cautionary tales. There might be discussion and what have you—but I think it would clear it wouldn’t be a fail-safe device.
    How much might she know about contraception? Depends if her French maid (all the best Regency girls have one, you know) is very forthcoming. *LOL*
    Is it believable to have women in Regency-set romances driven beyond reason by sexual desire? No. Okay, MAYBE. But I’m sorry, I remember my days before contraception was available to me, and nothing would be more of a dash of cold water during a make out session than “OMG, what if I got pregnant?” which was the be-all, end-all of awful. I’m in my 30s and I’m not even Catholic—just a little Protestant. The possibility of getting pregnant negated any possibility of enjoying myself—you can’t relax if you fear the worst, and to me that would be the worst. Accompanied, of course, by humiliation, ruined reputation, and being chucked by the male when it is revealed he’s actually engaged to someone else. Kissing, “petting” and sparking all fine. But no home runs.
    Do you have a strong preference between novels with explicit sex and those without it? Hmm. Middle ground. I prefer more explicit, but not erotica explicit. More emphasis on how everything feels rather than parts aligning.
    If the novel ends before the characters make love, is that okay, or do you feel cheated? YES.
    If the characters make love in the book, but the author “closes the bedroom door” is that okay, or annoying? Sometimes it’s okay. I think Kristin Higgins skips the explicit sex, and I love her books. There seems to still be enough shared that I don’t feel shut out, but I prefer the sex. (I almost always prefer the sex.) Though I believe sexual tension means more than sex. Can’t stand sex within the first 30 pages—feels like there’s nothing left to look forward to in the book.

    Reply
  42. When a novel’s heroine is a spinster, how much might she know about the male body, and about sexual intercourse, on her wedding night? VERY LITTLE. Logically I’d say she’d think the male body looks like a version of her, to a degree; or like a Greek statue…and then she can be confused by how much bigger his member looks than a statue. Or he’s hairier. There are authors who get around his by having a hero strip in a field unawares, or a real bookworm who finds all sorts of curious books, which I believe existed, but not as rampantly available as they seem to be for all those spinsters in that time period. (See, there comes a point where I think I’ve read too many novels. I’m so jaded.)
    How much might she know after it? PERHAPS EVEN LESS. *LOL* I vote for the “botched” sexual deflowering, and it progressively gets better. Heroines who automatically want to “kiss him there” without a minute’s question of hygiene or “ewww” leave me frustrated. I mean, I’m all about it now—but when I first had sex, I was a little less game. I believe in the power of persuasion.
    How much might she know about pregnancy — how it happens and the risks of different sexual acts? Hmm. This one I might rate a little more likely. There would be young women, maids, et al, who ended up pregnant who weren’t married. I think they would be excellent cautionary tales. There might be discussion and what have you—but I think it would clear it wouldn’t be a fail-safe device.
    How much might she know about contraception? Depends if her French maid (all the best Regency girls have one, you know) is very forthcoming. *LOL*
    Is it believable to have women in Regency-set romances driven beyond reason by sexual desire? No. Okay, MAYBE. But I’m sorry, I remember my days before contraception was available to me, and nothing would be more of a dash of cold water during a make out session than “OMG, what if I got pregnant?” which was the be-all, end-all of awful. I’m in my 30s and I’m not even Catholic—just a little Protestant. The possibility of getting pregnant negated any possibility of enjoying myself—you can’t relax if you fear the worst, and to me that would be the worst. Accompanied, of course, by humiliation, ruined reputation, and being chucked by the male when it is revealed he’s actually engaged to someone else. Kissing, “petting” and sparking all fine. But no home runs.
    Do you have a strong preference between novels with explicit sex and those without it? Hmm. Middle ground. I prefer more explicit, but not erotica explicit. More emphasis on how everything feels rather than parts aligning.
    If the novel ends before the characters make love, is that okay, or do you feel cheated? YES.
    If the characters make love in the book, but the author “closes the bedroom door” is that okay, or annoying? Sometimes it’s okay. I think Kristin Higgins skips the explicit sex, and I love her books. There seems to still be enough shared that I don’t feel shut out, but I prefer the sex. (I almost always prefer the sex.) Though I believe sexual tension means more than sex. Can’t stand sex within the first 30 pages—feels like there’s nothing left to look forward to in the book.

    Reply
  43. When a novel’s heroine is a spinster, how much might she know about the male body, and about sexual intercourse, on her wedding night? VERY LITTLE. Logically I’d say she’d think the male body looks like a version of her, to a degree; or like a Greek statue…and then she can be confused by how much bigger his member looks than a statue. Or he’s hairier. There are authors who get around his by having a hero strip in a field unawares, or a real bookworm who finds all sorts of curious books, which I believe existed, but not as rampantly available as they seem to be for all those spinsters in that time period. (See, there comes a point where I think I’ve read too many novels. I’m so jaded.)
    How much might she know after it? PERHAPS EVEN LESS. *LOL* I vote for the “botched” sexual deflowering, and it progressively gets better. Heroines who automatically want to “kiss him there” without a minute’s question of hygiene or “ewww” leave me frustrated. I mean, I’m all about it now—but when I first had sex, I was a little less game. I believe in the power of persuasion.
    How much might she know about pregnancy — how it happens and the risks of different sexual acts? Hmm. This one I might rate a little more likely. There would be young women, maids, et al, who ended up pregnant who weren’t married. I think they would be excellent cautionary tales. There might be discussion and what have you—but I think it would clear it wouldn’t be a fail-safe device.
    How much might she know about contraception? Depends if her French maid (all the best Regency girls have one, you know) is very forthcoming. *LOL*
    Is it believable to have women in Regency-set romances driven beyond reason by sexual desire? No. Okay, MAYBE. But I’m sorry, I remember my days before contraception was available to me, and nothing would be more of a dash of cold water during a make out session than “OMG, what if I got pregnant?” which was the be-all, end-all of awful. I’m in my 30s and I’m not even Catholic—just a little Protestant. The possibility of getting pregnant negated any possibility of enjoying myself—you can’t relax if you fear the worst, and to me that would be the worst. Accompanied, of course, by humiliation, ruined reputation, and being chucked by the male when it is revealed he’s actually engaged to someone else. Kissing, “petting” and sparking all fine. But no home runs.
    Do you have a strong preference between novels with explicit sex and those without it? Hmm. Middle ground. I prefer more explicit, but not erotica explicit. More emphasis on how everything feels rather than parts aligning.
    If the novel ends before the characters make love, is that okay, or do you feel cheated? YES.
    If the characters make love in the book, but the author “closes the bedroom door” is that okay, or annoying? Sometimes it’s okay. I think Kristin Higgins skips the explicit sex, and I love her books. There seems to still be enough shared that I don’t feel shut out, but I prefer the sex. (I almost always prefer the sex.) Though I believe sexual tension means more than sex. Can’t stand sex within the first 30 pages—feels like there’s nothing left to look forward to in the book.

    Reply
  44. When a novel’s heroine is a spinster, how much might she know about the male body, and about sexual intercourse, on her wedding night? VERY LITTLE. Logically I’d say she’d think the male body looks like a version of her, to a degree; or like a Greek statue…and then she can be confused by how much bigger his member looks than a statue. Or he’s hairier. There are authors who get around his by having a hero strip in a field unawares, or a real bookworm who finds all sorts of curious books, which I believe existed, but not as rampantly available as they seem to be for all those spinsters in that time period. (See, there comes a point where I think I’ve read too many novels. I’m so jaded.)
    How much might she know after it? PERHAPS EVEN LESS. *LOL* I vote for the “botched” sexual deflowering, and it progressively gets better. Heroines who automatically want to “kiss him there” without a minute’s question of hygiene or “ewww” leave me frustrated. I mean, I’m all about it now—but when I first had sex, I was a little less game. I believe in the power of persuasion.
    How much might she know about pregnancy — how it happens and the risks of different sexual acts? Hmm. This one I might rate a little more likely. There would be young women, maids, et al, who ended up pregnant who weren’t married. I think they would be excellent cautionary tales. There might be discussion and what have you—but I think it would clear it wouldn’t be a fail-safe device.
    How much might she know about contraception? Depends if her French maid (all the best Regency girls have one, you know) is very forthcoming. *LOL*
    Is it believable to have women in Regency-set romances driven beyond reason by sexual desire? No. Okay, MAYBE. But I’m sorry, I remember my days before contraception was available to me, and nothing would be more of a dash of cold water during a make out session than “OMG, what if I got pregnant?” which was the be-all, end-all of awful. I’m in my 30s and I’m not even Catholic—just a little Protestant. The possibility of getting pregnant negated any possibility of enjoying myself—you can’t relax if you fear the worst, and to me that would be the worst. Accompanied, of course, by humiliation, ruined reputation, and being chucked by the male when it is revealed he’s actually engaged to someone else. Kissing, “petting” and sparking all fine. But no home runs.
    Do you have a strong preference between novels with explicit sex and those without it? Hmm. Middle ground. I prefer more explicit, but not erotica explicit. More emphasis on how everything feels rather than parts aligning.
    If the novel ends before the characters make love, is that okay, or do you feel cheated? YES.
    If the characters make love in the book, but the author “closes the bedroom door” is that okay, or annoying? Sometimes it’s okay. I think Kristin Higgins skips the explicit sex, and I love her books. There seems to still be enough shared that I don’t feel shut out, but I prefer the sex. (I almost always prefer the sex.) Though I believe sexual tension means more than sex. Can’t stand sex within the first 30 pages—feels like there’s nothing left to look forward to in the book.

    Reply
  45. When a novel’s heroine is a spinster, how much might she know about the male body, and about sexual intercourse, on her wedding night? VERY LITTLE. Logically I’d say she’d think the male body looks like a version of her, to a degree; or like a Greek statue…and then she can be confused by how much bigger his member looks than a statue. Or he’s hairier. There are authors who get around his by having a hero strip in a field unawares, or a real bookworm who finds all sorts of curious books, which I believe existed, but not as rampantly available as they seem to be for all those spinsters in that time period. (See, there comes a point where I think I’ve read too many novels. I’m so jaded.)
    How much might she know after it? PERHAPS EVEN LESS. *LOL* I vote for the “botched” sexual deflowering, and it progressively gets better. Heroines who automatically want to “kiss him there” without a minute’s question of hygiene or “ewww” leave me frustrated. I mean, I’m all about it now—but when I first had sex, I was a little less game. I believe in the power of persuasion.
    How much might she know about pregnancy — how it happens and the risks of different sexual acts? Hmm. This one I might rate a little more likely. There would be young women, maids, et al, who ended up pregnant who weren’t married. I think they would be excellent cautionary tales. There might be discussion and what have you—but I think it would clear it wouldn’t be a fail-safe device.
    How much might she know about contraception? Depends if her French maid (all the best Regency girls have one, you know) is very forthcoming. *LOL*
    Is it believable to have women in Regency-set romances driven beyond reason by sexual desire? No. Okay, MAYBE. But I’m sorry, I remember my days before contraception was available to me, and nothing would be more of a dash of cold water during a make out session than “OMG, what if I got pregnant?” which was the be-all, end-all of awful. I’m in my 30s and I’m not even Catholic—just a little Protestant. The possibility of getting pregnant negated any possibility of enjoying myself—you can’t relax if you fear the worst, and to me that would be the worst. Accompanied, of course, by humiliation, ruined reputation, and being chucked by the male when it is revealed he’s actually engaged to someone else. Kissing, “petting” and sparking all fine. But no home runs.
    Do you have a strong preference between novels with explicit sex and those without it? Hmm. Middle ground. I prefer more explicit, but not erotica explicit. More emphasis on how everything feels rather than parts aligning.
    If the novel ends before the characters make love, is that okay, or do you feel cheated? YES.
    If the characters make love in the book, but the author “closes the bedroom door” is that okay, or annoying? Sometimes it’s okay. I think Kristin Higgins skips the explicit sex, and I love her books. There seems to still be enough shared that I don’t feel shut out, but I prefer the sex. (I almost always prefer the sex.) Though I believe sexual tension means more than sex. Can’t stand sex within the first 30 pages—feels like there’s nothing left to look forward to in the book.

    Reply
  46. I just do not know how much a spinster would know. Yes, she might have been exposed to things when in the country but would she have actually been around the animals or kept in a schoolroom where she could not observe?
    As to what I like to read – I am not a fan of erotica as I find it spoils the story line. I read for the suspense, the plot and character development. I tend to skip the sex scenes, especially ones that run to 3-5 pages and happen more than twice in the book.

    Reply
  47. I just do not know how much a spinster would know. Yes, she might have been exposed to things when in the country but would she have actually been around the animals or kept in a schoolroom where she could not observe?
    As to what I like to read – I am not a fan of erotica as I find it spoils the story line. I read for the suspense, the plot and character development. I tend to skip the sex scenes, especially ones that run to 3-5 pages and happen more than twice in the book.

    Reply
  48. I just do not know how much a spinster would know. Yes, she might have been exposed to things when in the country but would she have actually been around the animals or kept in a schoolroom where she could not observe?
    As to what I like to read – I am not a fan of erotica as I find it spoils the story line. I read for the suspense, the plot and character development. I tend to skip the sex scenes, especially ones that run to 3-5 pages and happen more than twice in the book.

    Reply
  49. I just do not know how much a spinster would know. Yes, she might have been exposed to things when in the country but would she have actually been around the animals or kept in a schoolroom where she could not observe?
    As to what I like to read – I am not a fan of erotica as I find it spoils the story line. I read for the suspense, the plot and character development. I tend to skip the sex scenes, especially ones that run to 3-5 pages and happen more than twice in the book.

    Reply
  50. I just do not know how much a spinster would know. Yes, she might have been exposed to things when in the country but would she have actually been around the animals or kept in a schoolroom where she could not observe?
    As to what I like to read – I am not a fan of erotica as I find it spoils the story line. I read for the suspense, the plot and character development. I tend to skip the sex scenes, especially ones that run to 3-5 pages and happen more than twice in the book.

    Reply
  51. I think the sex in the book should be appropriate to the story line meaning, in some books, sex at the end is great. In others, sex early on (but geez louise! At least let the H/Hn know each others names first!) might be the right thing for that particular story line.
    I wrote a story that didn’t have sex between the H/Hn until the last two chapters because they weren’t married until then and it was set in the 1870’s. One of the comments I got was, “wow, I had to read all that way to get to the sex??” *rolls eyes*
    As to the Regency Hn knowing anything, one author put it succinctly when the virgin hero was shocked to learn that humans did *it* face-to-face. That, I can understand. He’d only ever watched the farm animals. So, even if the Hn had seen animals copulate, they don’t. Face each other.
    I know that many men had their first experience in a brothel. Makes me wonder just how knowledegable they really were considering the more the whore pleased the man, the more she made. She wasn’t there to be pleased.
    As to throes of ecstasy for the virgin Hn, I’ve known friends who experienced it first time, so I can believe either/or there.
    What I can’t tolerate though is sex in a book simply to have it which is why I don’t read erotica. If it doesn’t have much of a plot and just ambles from sex scene to sex scene, no. Not my cup of tea.

    Reply
  52. I think the sex in the book should be appropriate to the story line meaning, in some books, sex at the end is great. In others, sex early on (but geez louise! At least let the H/Hn know each others names first!) might be the right thing for that particular story line.
    I wrote a story that didn’t have sex between the H/Hn until the last two chapters because they weren’t married until then and it was set in the 1870’s. One of the comments I got was, “wow, I had to read all that way to get to the sex??” *rolls eyes*
    As to the Regency Hn knowing anything, one author put it succinctly when the virgin hero was shocked to learn that humans did *it* face-to-face. That, I can understand. He’d only ever watched the farm animals. So, even if the Hn had seen animals copulate, they don’t. Face each other.
    I know that many men had their first experience in a brothel. Makes me wonder just how knowledegable they really were considering the more the whore pleased the man, the more she made. She wasn’t there to be pleased.
    As to throes of ecstasy for the virgin Hn, I’ve known friends who experienced it first time, so I can believe either/or there.
    What I can’t tolerate though is sex in a book simply to have it which is why I don’t read erotica. If it doesn’t have much of a plot and just ambles from sex scene to sex scene, no. Not my cup of tea.

    Reply
  53. I think the sex in the book should be appropriate to the story line meaning, in some books, sex at the end is great. In others, sex early on (but geez louise! At least let the H/Hn know each others names first!) might be the right thing for that particular story line.
    I wrote a story that didn’t have sex between the H/Hn until the last two chapters because they weren’t married until then and it was set in the 1870’s. One of the comments I got was, “wow, I had to read all that way to get to the sex??” *rolls eyes*
    As to the Regency Hn knowing anything, one author put it succinctly when the virgin hero was shocked to learn that humans did *it* face-to-face. That, I can understand. He’d only ever watched the farm animals. So, even if the Hn had seen animals copulate, they don’t. Face each other.
    I know that many men had their first experience in a brothel. Makes me wonder just how knowledegable they really were considering the more the whore pleased the man, the more she made. She wasn’t there to be pleased.
    As to throes of ecstasy for the virgin Hn, I’ve known friends who experienced it first time, so I can believe either/or there.
    What I can’t tolerate though is sex in a book simply to have it which is why I don’t read erotica. If it doesn’t have much of a plot and just ambles from sex scene to sex scene, no. Not my cup of tea.

    Reply
  54. I think the sex in the book should be appropriate to the story line meaning, in some books, sex at the end is great. In others, sex early on (but geez louise! At least let the H/Hn know each others names first!) might be the right thing for that particular story line.
    I wrote a story that didn’t have sex between the H/Hn until the last two chapters because they weren’t married until then and it was set in the 1870’s. One of the comments I got was, “wow, I had to read all that way to get to the sex??” *rolls eyes*
    As to the Regency Hn knowing anything, one author put it succinctly when the virgin hero was shocked to learn that humans did *it* face-to-face. That, I can understand. He’d only ever watched the farm animals. So, even if the Hn had seen animals copulate, they don’t. Face each other.
    I know that many men had their first experience in a brothel. Makes me wonder just how knowledegable they really were considering the more the whore pleased the man, the more she made. She wasn’t there to be pleased.
    As to throes of ecstasy for the virgin Hn, I’ve known friends who experienced it first time, so I can believe either/or there.
    What I can’t tolerate though is sex in a book simply to have it which is why I don’t read erotica. If it doesn’t have much of a plot and just ambles from sex scene to sex scene, no. Not my cup of tea.

    Reply
  55. I think the sex in the book should be appropriate to the story line meaning, in some books, sex at the end is great. In others, sex early on (but geez louise! At least let the H/Hn know each others names first!) might be the right thing for that particular story line.
    I wrote a story that didn’t have sex between the H/Hn until the last two chapters because they weren’t married until then and it was set in the 1870’s. One of the comments I got was, “wow, I had to read all that way to get to the sex??” *rolls eyes*
    As to the Regency Hn knowing anything, one author put it succinctly when the virgin hero was shocked to learn that humans did *it* face-to-face. That, I can understand. He’d only ever watched the farm animals. So, even if the Hn had seen animals copulate, they don’t. Face each other.
    I know that many men had their first experience in a brothel. Makes me wonder just how knowledegable they really were considering the more the whore pleased the man, the more she made. She wasn’t there to be pleased.
    As to throes of ecstasy for the virgin Hn, I’ve known friends who experienced it first time, so I can believe either/or there.
    What I can’t tolerate though is sex in a book simply to have it which is why I don’t read erotica. If it doesn’t have much of a plot and just ambles from sex scene to sex scene, no. Not my cup of tea.

    Reply
  56. I think that a spinster or young virgin would know very little and it would vary based on her social status too. A Lord’s daughter might not have the opportunity to view farm animals though she would see classical art. Her experiences would be affected if it was more of a business contract than a love match too. I have read of instances where the wife may never even see her husband unclothed and vise versa with periodic visits in the dark to her bedchamber. Romantic historical fiction allows for the love matches so we get the experienced or tender lovemaking experiences.

    Reply
  57. I think that a spinster or young virgin would know very little and it would vary based on her social status too. A Lord’s daughter might not have the opportunity to view farm animals though she would see classical art. Her experiences would be affected if it was more of a business contract than a love match too. I have read of instances where the wife may never even see her husband unclothed and vise versa with periodic visits in the dark to her bedchamber. Romantic historical fiction allows for the love matches so we get the experienced or tender lovemaking experiences.

    Reply
  58. I think that a spinster or young virgin would know very little and it would vary based on her social status too. A Lord’s daughter might not have the opportunity to view farm animals though she would see classical art. Her experiences would be affected if it was more of a business contract than a love match too. I have read of instances where the wife may never even see her husband unclothed and vise versa with periodic visits in the dark to her bedchamber. Romantic historical fiction allows for the love matches so we get the experienced or tender lovemaking experiences.

    Reply
  59. I think that a spinster or young virgin would know very little and it would vary based on her social status too. A Lord’s daughter might not have the opportunity to view farm animals though she would see classical art. Her experiences would be affected if it was more of a business contract than a love match too. I have read of instances where the wife may never even see her husband unclothed and vise versa with periodic visits in the dark to her bedchamber. Romantic historical fiction allows for the love matches so we get the experienced or tender lovemaking experiences.

    Reply
  60. I think that a spinster or young virgin would know very little and it would vary based on her social status too. A Lord’s daughter might not have the opportunity to view farm animals though she would see classical art. Her experiences would be affected if it was more of a business contract than a love match too. I have read of instances where the wife may never even see her husband unclothed and vise versa with periodic visits in the dark to her bedchamber. Romantic historical fiction allows for the love matches so we get the experienced or tender lovemaking experiences.

    Reply
  61. I don’t care for the heavy duty erotica either, but I do get very annoyed if the door is shut. I think most of the young ladies of the time knew a little bit, as most fathers or brothers would have had ‘dirty’ books hidden, and you know about curiosity. Enjoyed reading about the ‘celestial bed’, and I saw where there is a movie out with Maggie Gylenhall about vibrators in the 1800’s.

    Reply
  62. I don’t care for the heavy duty erotica either, but I do get very annoyed if the door is shut. I think most of the young ladies of the time knew a little bit, as most fathers or brothers would have had ‘dirty’ books hidden, and you know about curiosity. Enjoyed reading about the ‘celestial bed’, and I saw where there is a movie out with Maggie Gylenhall about vibrators in the 1800’s.

    Reply
  63. I don’t care for the heavy duty erotica either, but I do get very annoyed if the door is shut. I think most of the young ladies of the time knew a little bit, as most fathers or brothers would have had ‘dirty’ books hidden, and you know about curiosity. Enjoyed reading about the ‘celestial bed’, and I saw where there is a movie out with Maggie Gylenhall about vibrators in the 1800’s.

    Reply
  64. I don’t care for the heavy duty erotica either, but I do get very annoyed if the door is shut. I think most of the young ladies of the time knew a little bit, as most fathers or brothers would have had ‘dirty’ books hidden, and you know about curiosity. Enjoyed reading about the ‘celestial bed’, and I saw where there is a movie out with Maggie Gylenhall about vibrators in the 1800’s.

    Reply
  65. I don’t care for the heavy duty erotica either, but I do get very annoyed if the door is shut. I think most of the young ladies of the time knew a little bit, as most fathers or brothers would have had ‘dirty’ books hidden, and you know about curiosity. Enjoyed reading about the ‘celestial bed’, and I saw where there is a movie out with Maggie Gylenhall about vibrators in the 1800’s.

    Reply
  66. I think Hellion has said just about what I was going to say. The reply to the penultimate question is a little ambiguous – I feel cheated, generally.
    For me the most important issue is that scenes in which the characters make love should be credible in the context of their relationship with each other at that stage and should reveal more about how the characters feel about each other. Ideally, it should move the relationship on. Sometime there’s an impression that the author switches into “writing sex” mode and forgets about the individuals. Also, sometimes the way in which the characters interact afterwards doesn’t change at all. In either case the readers feels that the sex scene has been shoe-horned into the book.
    One tiny point of detail, just so you can correct it if I’m right – wouldn’t Jennifer Kloester have been talking about her new biography of Georgette Heyer (rather than of Jane Austen)?

    Reply
  67. I think Hellion has said just about what I was going to say. The reply to the penultimate question is a little ambiguous – I feel cheated, generally.
    For me the most important issue is that scenes in which the characters make love should be credible in the context of their relationship with each other at that stage and should reveal more about how the characters feel about each other. Ideally, it should move the relationship on. Sometime there’s an impression that the author switches into “writing sex” mode and forgets about the individuals. Also, sometimes the way in which the characters interact afterwards doesn’t change at all. In either case the readers feels that the sex scene has been shoe-horned into the book.
    One tiny point of detail, just so you can correct it if I’m right – wouldn’t Jennifer Kloester have been talking about her new biography of Georgette Heyer (rather than of Jane Austen)?

    Reply
  68. I think Hellion has said just about what I was going to say. The reply to the penultimate question is a little ambiguous – I feel cheated, generally.
    For me the most important issue is that scenes in which the characters make love should be credible in the context of their relationship with each other at that stage and should reveal more about how the characters feel about each other. Ideally, it should move the relationship on. Sometime there’s an impression that the author switches into “writing sex” mode and forgets about the individuals. Also, sometimes the way in which the characters interact afterwards doesn’t change at all. In either case the readers feels that the sex scene has been shoe-horned into the book.
    One tiny point of detail, just so you can correct it if I’m right – wouldn’t Jennifer Kloester have been talking about her new biography of Georgette Heyer (rather than of Jane Austen)?

    Reply
  69. I think Hellion has said just about what I was going to say. The reply to the penultimate question is a little ambiguous – I feel cheated, generally.
    For me the most important issue is that scenes in which the characters make love should be credible in the context of their relationship with each other at that stage and should reveal more about how the characters feel about each other. Ideally, it should move the relationship on. Sometime there’s an impression that the author switches into “writing sex” mode and forgets about the individuals. Also, sometimes the way in which the characters interact afterwards doesn’t change at all. In either case the readers feels that the sex scene has been shoe-horned into the book.
    One tiny point of detail, just so you can correct it if I’m right – wouldn’t Jennifer Kloester have been talking about her new biography of Georgette Heyer (rather than of Jane Austen)?

    Reply
  70. I think Hellion has said just about what I was going to say. The reply to the penultimate question is a little ambiguous – I feel cheated, generally.
    For me the most important issue is that scenes in which the characters make love should be credible in the context of their relationship with each other at that stage and should reveal more about how the characters feel about each other. Ideally, it should move the relationship on. Sometime there’s an impression that the author switches into “writing sex” mode and forgets about the individuals. Also, sometimes the way in which the characters interact afterwards doesn’t change at all. In either case the readers feels that the sex scene has been shoe-horned into the book.
    One tiny point of detail, just so you can correct it if I’m right – wouldn’t Jennifer Kloester have been talking about her new biography of Georgette Heyer (rather than of Jane Austen)?

    Reply
  71. Suzy, there is the problem of the experienced man and VD, but I mostly think of my heroes as experienced but very selective. There is a huge difference between that and picking up a street-walker.
    Hellion, re books, at the RNA day I mentioned Aretino’s Postures. I didn’t put an image on this blog for fear of startling some people, but they are very explicit. It was a popular pornography book for Georgian men, and though they probably wouldn’t leave it lying around I doubt they locked it away, either. They weren’t that hung up on maidenly ignorance in the Georgian age. So enterprising young ladies could have studied it, and as I say, it only takes one and then word will spread!
    There are some pictures of the book on this e-bay sale.
    http://www.ebay.com/itm/Aretino-Love-Positions-Raimondi-Romano-Carracci-117pics-/120773842388
    Jo

    Reply
  72. Suzy, there is the problem of the experienced man and VD, but I mostly think of my heroes as experienced but very selective. There is a huge difference between that and picking up a street-walker.
    Hellion, re books, at the RNA day I mentioned Aretino’s Postures. I didn’t put an image on this blog for fear of startling some people, but they are very explicit. It was a popular pornography book for Georgian men, and though they probably wouldn’t leave it lying around I doubt they locked it away, either. They weren’t that hung up on maidenly ignorance in the Georgian age. So enterprising young ladies could have studied it, and as I say, it only takes one and then word will spread!
    There are some pictures of the book on this e-bay sale.
    http://www.ebay.com/itm/Aretino-Love-Positions-Raimondi-Romano-Carracci-117pics-/120773842388
    Jo

    Reply
  73. Suzy, there is the problem of the experienced man and VD, but I mostly think of my heroes as experienced but very selective. There is a huge difference between that and picking up a street-walker.
    Hellion, re books, at the RNA day I mentioned Aretino’s Postures. I didn’t put an image on this blog for fear of startling some people, but they are very explicit. It was a popular pornography book for Georgian men, and though they probably wouldn’t leave it lying around I doubt they locked it away, either. They weren’t that hung up on maidenly ignorance in the Georgian age. So enterprising young ladies could have studied it, and as I say, it only takes one and then word will spread!
    There are some pictures of the book on this e-bay sale.
    http://www.ebay.com/itm/Aretino-Love-Positions-Raimondi-Romano-Carracci-117pics-/120773842388
    Jo

    Reply
  74. Suzy, there is the problem of the experienced man and VD, but I mostly think of my heroes as experienced but very selective. There is a huge difference between that and picking up a street-walker.
    Hellion, re books, at the RNA day I mentioned Aretino’s Postures. I didn’t put an image on this blog for fear of startling some people, but they are very explicit. It was a popular pornography book for Georgian men, and though they probably wouldn’t leave it lying around I doubt they locked it away, either. They weren’t that hung up on maidenly ignorance in the Georgian age. So enterprising young ladies could have studied it, and as I say, it only takes one and then word will spread!
    There are some pictures of the book on this e-bay sale.
    http://www.ebay.com/itm/Aretino-Love-Positions-Raimondi-Romano-Carracci-117pics-/120773842388
    Jo

    Reply
  75. Suzy, there is the problem of the experienced man and VD, but I mostly think of my heroes as experienced but very selective. There is a huge difference between that and picking up a street-walker.
    Hellion, re books, at the RNA day I mentioned Aretino’s Postures. I didn’t put an image on this blog for fear of startling some people, but they are very explicit. It was a popular pornography book for Georgian men, and though they probably wouldn’t leave it lying around I doubt they locked it away, either. They weren’t that hung up on maidenly ignorance in the Georgian age. So enterprising young ladies could have studied it, and as I say, it only takes one and then word will spread!
    There are some pictures of the book on this e-bay sale.
    http://www.ebay.com/itm/Aretino-Love-Positions-Raimondi-Romano-Carracci-117pics-/120773842388
    Jo

    Reply
  76. Jo back again.
    Hellion, I take your point about the sobering effect of the risk of pregnancy, but all the same young women did have unwanted pregnancies back when, and in the cases I knew they weren’t led astray by false promises, or forced, but simply wanted it so much at the time that good sense abandoned them. Both love and lust are powerful biochemical forces that can be overpowering. So if it’s set up right, I might believe it.
    Jo

    Reply
  77. Jo back again.
    Hellion, I take your point about the sobering effect of the risk of pregnancy, but all the same young women did have unwanted pregnancies back when, and in the cases I knew they weren’t led astray by false promises, or forced, but simply wanted it so much at the time that good sense abandoned them. Both love and lust are powerful biochemical forces that can be overpowering. So if it’s set up right, I might believe it.
    Jo

    Reply
  78. Jo back again.
    Hellion, I take your point about the sobering effect of the risk of pregnancy, but all the same young women did have unwanted pregnancies back when, and in the cases I knew they weren’t led astray by false promises, or forced, but simply wanted it so much at the time that good sense abandoned them. Both love and lust are powerful biochemical forces that can be overpowering. So if it’s set up right, I might believe it.
    Jo

    Reply
  79. Jo back again.
    Hellion, I take your point about the sobering effect of the risk of pregnancy, but all the same young women did have unwanted pregnancies back when, and in the cases I knew they weren’t led astray by false promises, or forced, but simply wanted it so much at the time that good sense abandoned them. Both love and lust are powerful biochemical forces that can be overpowering. So if it’s set up right, I might believe it.
    Jo

    Reply
  80. Jo back again.
    Hellion, I take your point about the sobering effect of the risk of pregnancy, but all the same young women did have unwanted pregnancies back when, and in the cases I knew they weren’t led astray by false promises, or forced, but simply wanted it so much at the time that good sense abandoned them. Both love and lust are powerful biochemical forces that can be overpowering. So if it’s set up right, I might believe it.
    Jo

    Reply
  81. Jo back again. Catching up!
    Jackie, Georgian girls and women would be out in the country a lot. We only need to look at Jane Austen — both her letters and her novels — to see them hiking around for pleasure and to visit friends and shops. Whatever was going on in the countryside, they’d be likely to see.
    Jo

    Reply
  82. Jo back again. Catching up!
    Jackie, Georgian girls and women would be out in the country a lot. We only need to look at Jane Austen — both her letters and her novels — to see them hiking around for pleasure and to visit friends and shops. Whatever was going on in the countryside, they’d be likely to see.
    Jo

    Reply
  83. Jo back again. Catching up!
    Jackie, Georgian girls and women would be out in the country a lot. We only need to look at Jane Austen — both her letters and her novels — to see them hiking around for pleasure and to visit friends and shops. Whatever was going on in the countryside, they’d be likely to see.
    Jo

    Reply
  84. Jo back again. Catching up!
    Jackie, Georgian girls and women would be out in the country a lot. We only need to look at Jane Austen — both her letters and her novels — to see them hiking around for pleasure and to visit friends and shops. Whatever was going on in the countryside, they’d be likely to see.
    Jo

    Reply
  85. Jo back again. Catching up!
    Jackie, Georgian girls and women would be out in the country a lot. We only need to look at Jane Austen — both her letters and her novels — to see them hiking around for pleasure and to visit friends and shops. Whatever was going on in the countryside, they’d be likely to see.
    Jo

    Reply
  86. Thanks for this lovely write-up of Regency Day, Jo, and also for posting up the cover of my tigerish ‘bestseller’, ho ho. Lovely to see my book featured on Word Wenches!
    I haven’t done my blog post on this yet but must soon. So busy finishing my novel, my head is spinning.
    But wasn’t it a great day? I took an excellent shot of ‘Matt’, the dashing Regency officer with whom I had a quick cigarette during one of the breaks. Something to drool over – oops, I mean, study – for future novels.
    Lovely to meet you, and I can’t wait for the next RNA specialist day.

    Reply
  87. Thanks for this lovely write-up of Regency Day, Jo, and also for posting up the cover of my tigerish ‘bestseller’, ho ho. Lovely to see my book featured on Word Wenches!
    I haven’t done my blog post on this yet but must soon. So busy finishing my novel, my head is spinning.
    But wasn’t it a great day? I took an excellent shot of ‘Matt’, the dashing Regency officer with whom I had a quick cigarette during one of the breaks. Something to drool over – oops, I mean, study – for future novels.
    Lovely to meet you, and I can’t wait for the next RNA specialist day.

    Reply
  88. Thanks for this lovely write-up of Regency Day, Jo, and also for posting up the cover of my tigerish ‘bestseller’, ho ho. Lovely to see my book featured on Word Wenches!
    I haven’t done my blog post on this yet but must soon. So busy finishing my novel, my head is spinning.
    But wasn’t it a great day? I took an excellent shot of ‘Matt’, the dashing Regency officer with whom I had a quick cigarette during one of the breaks. Something to drool over – oops, I mean, study – for future novels.
    Lovely to meet you, and I can’t wait for the next RNA specialist day.

    Reply
  89. Thanks for this lovely write-up of Regency Day, Jo, and also for posting up the cover of my tigerish ‘bestseller’, ho ho. Lovely to see my book featured on Word Wenches!
    I haven’t done my blog post on this yet but must soon. So busy finishing my novel, my head is spinning.
    But wasn’t it a great day? I took an excellent shot of ‘Matt’, the dashing Regency officer with whom I had a quick cigarette during one of the breaks. Something to drool over – oops, I mean, study – for future novels.
    Lovely to meet you, and I can’t wait for the next RNA specialist day.

    Reply
  90. Thanks for this lovely write-up of Regency Day, Jo, and also for posting up the cover of my tigerish ‘bestseller’, ho ho. Lovely to see my book featured on Word Wenches!
    I haven’t done my blog post on this yet but must soon. So busy finishing my novel, my head is spinning.
    But wasn’t it a great day? I took an excellent shot of ‘Matt’, the dashing Regency officer with whom I had a quick cigarette during one of the breaks. Something to drool over – oops, I mean, study – for future novels.
    Lovely to meet you, and I can’t wait for the next RNA specialist day.

    Reply
  91. Great post, Jo. I was lucky enough to be at the Regency Readers’ Day and I enjoyed every moment. Your panel on ‘Sex and the Georgians’ was great: intelligent, informative and witty. I noticed that the ‘soldiers’ from the Napoleonic Association re-enactment who added so much to the ambience of the occasion were enjoying it, too – to judge by their laughter. I suspect they were also somewhat taken aback by the panellists’ frankness!

    Reply
  92. Great post, Jo. I was lucky enough to be at the Regency Readers’ Day and I enjoyed every moment. Your panel on ‘Sex and the Georgians’ was great: intelligent, informative and witty. I noticed that the ‘soldiers’ from the Napoleonic Association re-enactment who added so much to the ambience of the occasion were enjoying it, too – to judge by their laughter. I suspect they were also somewhat taken aback by the panellists’ frankness!

    Reply
  93. Great post, Jo. I was lucky enough to be at the Regency Readers’ Day and I enjoyed every moment. Your panel on ‘Sex and the Georgians’ was great: intelligent, informative and witty. I noticed that the ‘soldiers’ from the Napoleonic Association re-enactment who added so much to the ambience of the occasion were enjoying it, too – to judge by their laughter. I suspect they were also somewhat taken aback by the panellists’ frankness!

    Reply
  94. Great post, Jo. I was lucky enough to be at the Regency Readers’ Day and I enjoyed every moment. Your panel on ‘Sex and the Georgians’ was great: intelligent, informative and witty. I noticed that the ‘soldiers’ from the Napoleonic Association re-enactment who added so much to the ambience of the occasion were enjoying it, too – to judge by their laughter. I suspect they were also somewhat taken aback by the panellists’ frankness!

    Reply
  95. Great post, Jo. I was lucky enough to be at the Regency Readers’ Day and I enjoyed every moment. Your panel on ‘Sex and the Georgians’ was great: intelligent, informative and witty. I noticed that the ‘soldiers’ from the Napoleonic Association re-enactment who added so much to the ambience of the occasion were enjoying it, too – to judge by their laughter. I suspect they were also somewhat taken aback by the panellists’ frankness!

    Reply
  96. I’m with those who want the sex to fit the story and what we know (or what we need to know) about the hero and heroine. It should move the story along.
    Jo B. preempted me, but I also thought that folks were less hung up about sex during the Georgian/Regency periods than, say, the Victorian period. Surely that affected what people knew.
    A pet peeve of mine is the heroine achieving ecstasy on the first encounter without at least a little additional attention (trying to be circumspect here) during the main event.

    Reply
  97. I’m with those who want the sex to fit the story and what we know (or what we need to know) about the hero and heroine. It should move the story along.
    Jo B. preempted me, but I also thought that folks were less hung up about sex during the Georgian/Regency periods than, say, the Victorian period. Surely that affected what people knew.
    A pet peeve of mine is the heroine achieving ecstasy on the first encounter without at least a little additional attention (trying to be circumspect here) during the main event.

    Reply
  98. I’m with those who want the sex to fit the story and what we know (or what we need to know) about the hero and heroine. It should move the story along.
    Jo B. preempted me, but I also thought that folks were less hung up about sex during the Georgian/Regency periods than, say, the Victorian period. Surely that affected what people knew.
    A pet peeve of mine is the heroine achieving ecstasy on the first encounter without at least a little additional attention (trying to be circumspect here) during the main event.

    Reply
  99. I’m with those who want the sex to fit the story and what we know (or what we need to know) about the hero and heroine. It should move the story along.
    Jo B. preempted me, but I also thought that folks were less hung up about sex during the Georgian/Regency periods than, say, the Victorian period. Surely that affected what people knew.
    A pet peeve of mine is the heroine achieving ecstasy on the first encounter without at least a little additional attention (trying to be circumspect here) during the main event.

    Reply
  100. I’m with those who want the sex to fit the story and what we know (or what we need to know) about the hero and heroine. It should move the story along.
    Jo B. preempted me, but I also thought that folks were less hung up about sex during the Georgian/Regency periods than, say, the Victorian period. Surely that affected what people knew.
    A pet peeve of mine is the heroine achieving ecstasy on the first encounter without at least a little additional attention (trying to be circumspect here) during the main event.

    Reply
  101. HJ said “wouldn’t Jennifer Kloester have been talking about her new biography of Georgette Heyer (rather than of Jane Austen)? ”
    Whoops! I’ll nip in and change that. Thanks!
    Jo

    Reply
  102. HJ said “wouldn’t Jennifer Kloester have been talking about her new biography of Georgette Heyer (rather than of Jane Austen)? ”
    Whoops! I’ll nip in and change that. Thanks!
    Jo

    Reply
  103. HJ said “wouldn’t Jennifer Kloester have been talking about her new biography of Georgette Heyer (rather than of Jane Austen)? ”
    Whoops! I’ll nip in and change that. Thanks!
    Jo

    Reply
  104. HJ said “wouldn’t Jennifer Kloester have been talking about her new biography of Georgette Heyer (rather than of Jane Austen)? ”
    Whoops! I’ll nip in and change that. Thanks!
    Jo

    Reply
  105. HJ said “wouldn’t Jennifer Kloester have been talking about her new biography of Georgette Heyer (rather than of Jane Austen)? ”
    Whoops! I’ll nip in and change that. Thanks!
    Jo

    Reply
  106. Jo here. Great comments, everyone.
    I think it’s important to distinguish between the Victorian period and what came before. The Victorian period produced an explosion of printed material which tends to overwhelm earlier ages, and a lot of our “it was like that in the past” is based on it. However, it was IMO a long variation from the norm in which a rising middle class imposed stricter rules in order to feel secure. Sometimes they invented or embroidered history to support their way of looking at things.
    Jo

    Reply
  107. Jo here. Great comments, everyone.
    I think it’s important to distinguish between the Victorian period and what came before. The Victorian period produced an explosion of printed material which tends to overwhelm earlier ages, and a lot of our “it was like that in the past” is based on it. However, it was IMO a long variation from the norm in which a rising middle class imposed stricter rules in order to feel secure. Sometimes they invented or embroidered history to support their way of looking at things.
    Jo

    Reply
  108. Jo here. Great comments, everyone.
    I think it’s important to distinguish between the Victorian period and what came before. The Victorian period produced an explosion of printed material which tends to overwhelm earlier ages, and a lot of our “it was like that in the past” is based on it. However, it was IMO a long variation from the norm in which a rising middle class imposed stricter rules in order to feel secure. Sometimes they invented or embroidered history to support their way of looking at things.
    Jo

    Reply
  109. Jo here. Great comments, everyone.
    I think it’s important to distinguish between the Victorian period and what came before. The Victorian period produced an explosion of printed material which tends to overwhelm earlier ages, and a lot of our “it was like that in the past” is based on it. However, it was IMO a long variation from the norm in which a rising middle class imposed stricter rules in order to feel secure. Sometimes they invented or embroidered history to support their way of looking at things.
    Jo

    Reply
  110. Jo here. Great comments, everyone.
    I think it’s important to distinguish between the Victorian period and what came before. The Victorian period produced an explosion of printed material which tends to overwhelm earlier ages, and a lot of our “it was like that in the past” is based on it. However, it was IMO a long variation from the norm in which a rising middle class imposed stricter rules in order to feel secure. Sometimes they invented or embroidered history to support their way of looking at things.
    Jo

    Reply
  111. Long comment. You’ve pushed all my buttons.
    When a novel’s heroine is a spinster, how much might she know about the male body, and about sexual intercourse, on her wedding night?
    Depends on her status. I think those of the lower orders knew plenty. But, for the upper classes, one of the bargaining chips for a girl to make a good marriage was for her to be a virgin. So, her parents tended not to tell her much about sex, in the hopes that she wouldn’t do it. (As an aside, parents today still do that. It didn’t work then and it doesn’t work now, IMO) But I’m sure she and her girlfriends talked. And peeked, if they had the chance.
    How much might she know after it?
    LOL!Depends on what her husband knew. Of course, he already knew the mechanics. But, depending on how he applied his knowledge, she would either like sex or hate it.
    How much might she know about pregnancy — how it happens and the risks of different sexual acts?
    I’m sure she knew sex could result in pregnancy. Then, as now, mothers drum it into their daughters’ heads. I doubt she knew any of the more risque versions of sex. Again, might depend on social class.
    How much might she know about contraception?
    Depends on her class, but the general answer is zilch. Somehow, parents think if they don’t tell their daughters about contraception, they won’t have sex–a subset of “they won’t have sex if we don’t say anything about it.” Wrongheaded, in my opinion. Women everywhere want to have sex, and better to be prepared than not to be.
    Is it believable to have women in Regency-set romances driven beyond reason by sexual desire?
    No. Societal and familial ties were much tighter then than now. Your actions reflected not only on you, but on your family and associates, and could ostracize them as well as you. Think Pride and Prejudice. Most people would think twice about such an act. Also, ostracicm has always been worse for women than for men, and still is, so women have to be careful. Not that everyone cared (Lydia). I believe some women didn’t. If they were careful or lucky, they didn’t pay the price. But I think most did.
    Do you have a strong preference between novels with explicit sex and those without it?
    Some sex is fine, but I don’t like reams of detailed descriptions. I hate stories that are half detailed descriptions of various sexual acts. I want a story, first and foremost. Some sex, if it’s part of the story, is fine. But I hate books where I’m reading page after page after page, etc., of sexual acts and I’m thinking “where’s the story?” This has happened.
    If the novel ends before the characters make love, is that okay, or do you feel cheated?
    Fine with me. I don’t feel cheated. I prefer emotions, love, and yearning to descriptions of sweaty body parts. I like characters who think about sex and it shows in their actions, rather than in the aforementioned sweaty body parts. At this point, I’ve read so many descriptions of sex, I think I’m burned out. Really, how many variations are there?
    If the characters make love in the book, but the author “closes the bedroom door” is that okay, or annoying?
    That’s OK. See above answer. LOL

    Reply
  112. Long comment. You’ve pushed all my buttons.
    When a novel’s heroine is a spinster, how much might she know about the male body, and about sexual intercourse, on her wedding night?
    Depends on her status. I think those of the lower orders knew plenty. But, for the upper classes, one of the bargaining chips for a girl to make a good marriage was for her to be a virgin. So, her parents tended not to tell her much about sex, in the hopes that she wouldn’t do it. (As an aside, parents today still do that. It didn’t work then and it doesn’t work now, IMO) But I’m sure she and her girlfriends talked. And peeked, if they had the chance.
    How much might she know after it?
    LOL!Depends on what her husband knew. Of course, he already knew the mechanics. But, depending on how he applied his knowledge, she would either like sex or hate it.
    How much might she know about pregnancy — how it happens and the risks of different sexual acts?
    I’m sure she knew sex could result in pregnancy. Then, as now, mothers drum it into their daughters’ heads. I doubt she knew any of the more risque versions of sex. Again, might depend on social class.
    How much might she know about contraception?
    Depends on her class, but the general answer is zilch. Somehow, parents think if they don’t tell their daughters about contraception, they won’t have sex–a subset of “they won’t have sex if we don’t say anything about it.” Wrongheaded, in my opinion. Women everywhere want to have sex, and better to be prepared than not to be.
    Is it believable to have women in Regency-set romances driven beyond reason by sexual desire?
    No. Societal and familial ties were much tighter then than now. Your actions reflected not only on you, but on your family and associates, and could ostracize them as well as you. Think Pride and Prejudice. Most people would think twice about such an act. Also, ostracicm has always been worse for women than for men, and still is, so women have to be careful. Not that everyone cared (Lydia). I believe some women didn’t. If they were careful or lucky, they didn’t pay the price. But I think most did.
    Do you have a strong preference between novels with explicit sex and those without it?
    Some sex is fine, but I don’t like reams of detailed descriptions. I hate stories that are half detailed descriptions of various sexual acts. I want a story, first and foremost. Some sex, if it’s part of the story, is fine. But I hate books where I’m reading page after page after page, etc., of sexual acts and I’m thinking “where’s the story?” This has happened.
    If the novel ends before the characters make love, is that okay, or do you feel cheated?
    Fine with me. I don’t feel cheated. I prefer emotions, love, and yearning to descriptions of sweaty body parts. I like characters who think about sex and it shows in their actions, rather than in the aforementioned sweaty body parts. At this point, I’ve read so many descriptions of sex, I think I’m burned out. Really, how many variations are there?
    If the characters make love in the book, but the author “closes the bedroom door” is that okay, or annoying?
    That’s OK. See above answer. LOL

    Reply
  113. Long comment. You’ve pushed all my buttons.
    When a novel’s heroine is a spinster, how much might she know about the male body, and about sexual intercourse, on her wedding night?
    Depends on her status. I think those of the lower orders knew plenty. But, for the upper classes, one of the bargaining chips for a girl to make a good marriage was for her to be a virgin. So, her parents tended not to tell her much about sex, in the hopes that she wouldn’t do it. (As an aside, parents today still do that. It didn’t work then and it doesn’t work now, IMO) But I’m sure she and her girlfriends talked. And peeked, if they had the chance.
    How much might she know after it?
    LOL!Depends on what her husband knew. Of course, he already knew the mechanics. But, depending on how he applied his knowledge, she would either like sex or hate it.
    How much might she know about pregnancy — how it happens and the risks of different sexual acts?
    I’m sure she knew sex could result in pregnancy. Then, as now, mothers drum it into their daughters’ heads. I doubt she knew any of the more risque versions of sex. Again, might depend on social class.
    How much might she know about contraception?
    Depends on her class, but the general answer is zilch. Somehow, parents think if they don’t tell their daughters about contraception, they won’t have sex–a subset of “they won’t have sex if we don’t say anything about it.” Wrongheaded, in my opinion. Women everywhere want to have sex, and better to be prepared than not to be.
    Is it believable to have women in Regency-set romances driven beyond reason by sexual desire?
    No. Societal and familial ties were much tighter then than now. Your actions reflected not only on you, but on your family and associates, and could ostracize them as well as you. Think Pride and Prejudice. Most people would think twice about such an act. Also, ostracicm has always been worse for women than for men, and still is, so women have to be careful. Not that everyone cared (Lydia). I believe some women didn’t. If they were careful or lucky, they didn’t pay the price. But I think most did.
    Do you have a strong preference between novels with explicit sex and those without it?
    Some sex is fine, but I don’t like reams of detailed descriptions. I hate stories that are half detailed descriptions of various sexual acts. I want a story, first and foremost. Some sex, if it’s part of the story, is fine. But I hate books where I’m reading page after page after page, etc., of sexual acts and I’m thinking “where’s the story?” This has happened.
    If the novel ends before the characters make love, is that okay, or do you feel cheated?
    Fine with me. I don’t feel cheated. I prefer emotions, love, and yearning to descriptions of sweaty body parts. I like characters who think about sex and it shows in their actions, rather than in the aforementioned sweaty body parts. At this point, I’ve read so many descriptions of sex, I think I’m burned out. Really, how many variations are there?
    If the characters make love in the book, but the author “closes the bedroom door” is that okay, or annoying?
    That’s OK. See above answer. LOL

    Reply
  114. Long comment. You’ve pushed all my buttons.
    When a novel’s heroine is a spinster, how much might she know about the male body, and about sexual intercourse, on her wedding night?
    Depends on her status. I think those of the lower orders knew plenty. But, for the upper classes, one of the bargaining chips for a girl to make a good marriage was for her to be a virgin. So, her parents tended not to tell her much about sex, in the hopes that she wouldn’t do it. (As an aside, parents today still do that. It didn’t work then and it doesn’t work now, IMO) But I’m sure she and her girlfriends talked. And peeked, if they had the chance.
    How much might she know after it?
    LOL!Depends on what her husband knew. Of course, he already knew the mechanics. But, depending on how he applied his knowledge, she would either like sex or hate it.
    How much might she know about pregnancy — how it happens and the risks of different sexual acts?
    I’m sure she knew sex could result in pregnancy. Then, as now, mothers drum it into their daughters’ heads. I doubt she knew any of the more risque versions of sex. Again, might depend on social class.
    How much might she know about contraception?
    Depends on her class, but the general answer is zilch. Somehow, parents think if they don’t tell their daughters about contraception, they won’t have sex–a subset of “they won’t have sex if we don’t say anything about it.” Wrongheaded, in my opinion. Women everywhere want to have sex, and better to be prepared than not to be.
    Is it believable to have women in Regency-set romances driven beyond reason by sexual desire?
    No. Societal and familial ties were much tighter then than now. Your actions reflected not only on you, but on your family and associates, and could ostracize them as well as you. Think Pride and Prejudice. Most people would think twice about such an act. Also, ostracicm has always been worse for women than for men, and still is, so women have to be careful. Not that everyone cared (Lydia). I believe some women didn’t. If they were careful or lucky, they didn’t pay the price. But I think most did.
    Do you have a strong preference between novels with explicit sex and those without it?
    Some sex is fine, but I don’t like reams of detailed descriptions. I hate stories that are half detailed descriptions of various sexual acts. I want a story, first and foremost. Some sex, if it’s part of the story, is fine. But I hate books where I’m reading page after page after page, etc., of sexual acts and I’m thinking “where’s the story?” This has happened.
    If the novel ends before the characters make love, is that okay, or do you feel cheated?
    Fine with me. I don’t feel cheated. I prefer emotions, love, and yearning to descriptions of sweaty body parts. I like characters who think about sex and it shows in their actions, rather than in the aforementioned sweaty body parts. At this point, I’ve read so many descriptions of sex, I think I’m burned out. Really, how many variations are there?
    If the characters make love in the book, but the author “closes the bedroom door” is that okay, or annoying?
    That’s OK. See above answer. LOL

    Reply
  115. Long comment. You’ve pushed all my buttons.
    When a novel’s heroine is a spinster, how much might she know about the male body, and about sexual intercourse, on her wedding night?
    Depends on her status. I think those of the lower orders knew plenty. But, for the upper classes, one of the bargaining chips for a girl to make a good marriage was for her to be a virgin. So, her parents tended not to tell her much about sex, in the hopes that she wouldn’t do it. (As an aside, parents today still do that. It didn’t work then and it doesn’t work now, IMO) But I’m sure she and her girlfriends talked. And peeked, if they had the chance.
    How much might she know after it?
    LOL!Depends on what her husband knew. Of course, he already knew the mechanics. But, depending on how he applied his knowledge, she would either like sex or hate it.
    How much might she know about pregnancy — how it happens and the risks of different sexual acts?
    I’m sure she knew sex could result in pregnancy. Then, as now, mothers drum it into their daughters’ heads. I doubt she knew any of the more risque versions of sex. Again, might depend on social class.
    How much might she know about contraception?
    Depends on her class, but the general answer is zilch. Somehow, parents think if they don’t tell their daughters about contraception, they won’t have sex–a subset of “they won’t have sex if we don’t say anything about it.” Wrongheaded, in my opinion. Women everywhere want to have sex, and better to be prepared than not to be.
    Is it believable to have women in Regency-set romances driven beyond reason by sexual desire?
    No. Societal and familial ties were much tighter then than now. Your actions reflected not only on you, but on your family and associates, and could ostracize them as well as you. Think Pride and Prejudice. Most people would think twice about such an act. Also, ostracicm has always been worse for women than for men, and still is, so women have to be careful. Not that everyone cared (Lydia). I believe some women didn’t. If they were careful or lucky, they didn’t pay the price. But I think most did.
    Do you have a strong preference between novels with explicit sex and those without it?
    Some sex is fine, but I don’t like reams of detailed descriptions. I hate stories that are half detailed descriptions of various sexual acts. I want a story, first and foremost. Some sex, if it’s part of the story, is fine. But I hate books where I’m reading page after page after page, etc., of sexual acts and I’m thinking “where’s the story?” This has happened.
    If the novel ends before the characters make love, is that okay, or do you feel cheated?
    Fine with me. I don’t feel cheated. I prefer emotions, love, and yearning to descriptions of sweaty body parts. I like characters who think about sex and it shows in their actions, rather than in the aforementioned sweaty body parts. At this point, I’ve read so many descriptions of sex, I think I’m burned out. Really, how many variations are there?
    If the characters make love in the book, but the author “closes the bedroom door” is that okay, or annoying?
    That’s OK. See above answer. LOL

    Reply
  116. I agree there were always some women who were more willing. *LOL* But I agree with Linda: the societal and familial ties were tighter, and young women were just less likely (even if they were really tempted).
    I know the modern era has not invented passion or promiscuity; however, I can say the type of parents that Linda noted (“Don’t tell them anything so they don’t do it”) are very much my parents. My way of escape was to read romance novels–that’s where I got my “knowledge”, but I can tell you that my societal and familial (esp the latter) upbringing curbed a lot of my experimenting.
    Also I can say that I was stuck out in the middle of nowhere most of my raising years. I went to school, but I wasn’t exactly given a lot of opportunity for making out in the halls. After school, I went directly home, far from town, far from people to interact with. Lack of opportunity counts. If these girls are living in the country–unless they’re making out with footmen and stable boys–I’m going to say lack of opportunity contributed to a lot of lack of knowledge to.
    I also think of the Season as our equivalent as Prom–so we always saved the big stuff for PROM NIGHT. *LOL*

    Reply
  117. I agree there were always some women who were more willing. *LOL* But I agree with Linda: the societal and familial ties were tighter, and young women were just less likely (even if they were really tempted).
    I know the modern era has not invented passion or promiscuity; however, I can say the type of parents that Linda noted (“Don’t tell them anything so they don’t do it”) are very much my parents. My way of escape was to read romance novels–that’s where I got my “knowledge”, but I can tell you that my societal and familial (esp the latter) upbringing curbed a lot of my experimenting.
    Also I can say that I was stuck out in the middle of nowhere most of my raising years. I went to school, but I wasn’t exactly given a lot of opportunity for making out in the halls. After school, I went directly home, far from town, far from people to interact with. Lack of opportunity counts. If these girls are living in the country–unless they’re making out with footmen and stable boys–I’m going to say lack of opportunity contributed to a lot of lack of knowledge to.
    I also think of the Season as our equivalent as Prom–so we always saved the big stuff for PROM NIGHT. *LOL*

    Reply
  118. I agree there were always some women who were more willing. *LOL* But I agree with Linda: the societal and familial ties were tighter, and young women were just less likely (even if they were really tempted).
    I know the modern era has not invented passion or promiscuity; however, I can say the type of parents that Linda noted (“Don’t tell them anything so they don’t do it”) are very much my parents. My way of escape was to read romance novels–that’s where I got my “knowledge”, but I can tell you that my societal and familial (esp the latter) upbringing curbed a lot of my experimenting.
    Also I can say that I was stuck out in the middle of nowhere most of my raising years. I went to school, but I wasn’t exactly given a lot of opportunity for making out in the halls. After school, I went directly home, far from town, far from people to interact with. Lack of opportunity counts. If these girls are living in the country–unless they’re making out with footmen and stable boys–I’m going to say lack of opportunity contributed to a lot of lack of knowledge to.
    I also think of the Season as our equivalent as Prom–so we always saved the big stuff for PROM NIGHT. *LOL*

    Reply
  119. I agree there were always some women who were more willing. *LOL* But I agree with Linda: the societal and familial ties were tighter, and young women were just less likely (even if they were really tempted).
    I know the modern era has not invented passion or promiscuity; however, I can say the type of parents that Linda noted (“Don’t tell them anything so they don’t do it”) are very much my parents. My way of escape was to read romance novels–that’s where I got my “knowledge”, but I can tell you that my societal and familial (esp the latter) upbringing curbed a lot of my experimenting.
    Also I can say that I was stuck out in the middle of nowhere most of my raising years. I went to school, but I wasn’t exactly given a lot of opportunity for making out in the halls. After school, I went directly home, far from town, far from people to interact with. Lack of opportunity counts. If these girls are living in the country–unless they’re making out with footmen and stable boys–I’m going to say lack of opportunity contributed to a lot of lack of knowledge to.
    I also think of the Season as our equivalent as Prom–so we always saved the big stuff for PROM NIGHT. *LOL*

    Reply
  120. I agree there were always some women who were more willing. *LOL* But I agree with Linda: the societal and familial ties were tighter, and young women were just less likely (even if they were really tempted).
    I know the modern era has not invented passion or promiscuity; however, I can say the type of parents that Linda noted (“Don’t tell them anything so they don’t do it”) are very much my parents. My way of escape was to read romance novels–that’s where I got my “knowledge”, but I can tell you that my societal and familial (esp the latter) upbringing curbed a lot of my experimenting.
    Also I can say that I was stuck out in the middle of nowhere most of my raising years. I went to school, but I wasn’t exactly given a lot of opportunity for making out in the halls. After school, I went directly home, far from town, far from people to interact with. Lack of opportunity counts. If these girls are living in the country–unless they’re making out with footmen and stable boys–I’m going to say lack of opportunity contributed to a lot of lack of knowledge to.
    I also think of the Season as our equivalent as Prom–so we always saved the big stuff for PROM NIGHT. *LOL*

    Reply
  121. Oh, and I know the Georgian era was different. *LOL* Far more willing to accept sexually promiscuous virgins in that era. *LOL*
    That book is an eye opener!

    Reply
  122. Oh, and I know the Georgian era was different. *LOL* Far more willing to accept sexually promiscuous virgins in that era. *LOL*
    That book is an eye opener!

    Reply
  123. Oh, and I know the Georgian era was different. *LOL* Far more willing to accept sexually promiscuous virgins in that era. *LOL*
    That book is an eye opener!

    Reply
  124. Oh, and I know the Georgian era was different. *LOL* Far more willing to accept sexually promiscuous virgins in that era. *LOL*
    That book is an eye opener!

    Reply
  125. Oh, and I know the Georgian era was different. *LOL* Far more willing to accept sexually promiscuous virgins in that era. *LOL*
    That book is an eye opener!

    Reply
  126. No, I don’t want the door shut! I want to be there. And depending on the individual book, sometimes it’s great for it to be a little hot, too.

    Reply
  127. No, I don’t want the door shut! I want to be there. And depending on the individual book, sometimes it’s great for it to be a little hot, too.

    Reply
  128. No, I don’t want the door shut! I want to be there. And depending on the individual book, sometimes it’s great for it to be a little hot, too.

    Reply
  129. No, I don’t want the door shut! I want to be there. And depending on the individual book, sometimes it’s great for it to be a little hot, too.

    Reply
  130. No, I don’t want the door shut! I want to be there. And depending on the individual book, sometimes it’s great for it to be a little hot, too.

    Reply
  131. I think that then, as now, how much knowledge the aristocratic heroine had would depend. It would depend on whether she had sisters or friends who didn’t want her to go to the marriage bed as ignorant as they were (mothers might feel that way but be far more constrained in what they told their daughters). It would depend on whether the gossips at her first ball spoke far too openly, not knowing she was standing on the other side of the potted palm. It would depend on whether she had brothers whom she saw unclothed or accidentally walked in on as they were tupping the maid. OTOH, she might easily understand the differences in anatomy but have no clue about the act itself.
    Must admit I like the occasional story where the hero and heroine discover life and love together or where the heroine is the more experienced one as a break from the all-knowing, all-orgasms-all-the-time kind of hero — a bit of variety to make my reading more interesting.

    Reply
  132. I think that then, as now, how much knowledge the aristocratic heroine had would depend. It would depend on whether she had sisters or friends who didn’t want her to go to the marriage bed as ignorant as they were (mothers might feel that way but be far more constrained in what they told their daughters). It would depend on whether the gossips at her first ball spoke far too openly, not knowing she was standing on the other side of the potted palm. It would depend on whether she had brothers whom she saw unclothed or accidentally walked in on as they were tupping the maid. OTOH, she might easily understand the differences in anatomy but have no clue about the act itself.
    Must admit I like the occasional story where the hero and heroine discover life and love together or where the heroine is the more experienced one as a break from the all-knowing, all-orgasms-all-the-time kind of hero — a bit of variety to make my reading more interesting.

    Reply
  133. I think that then, as now, how much knowledge the aristocratic heroine had would depend. It would depend on whether she had sisters or friends who didn’t want her to go to the marriage bed as ignorant as they were (mothers might feel that way but be far more constrained in what they told their daughters). It would depend on whether the gossips at her first ball spoke far too openly, not knowing she was standing on the other side of the potted palm. It would depend on whether she had brothers whom she saw unclothed or accidentally walked in on as they were tupping the maid. OTOH, she might easily understand the differences in anatomy but have no clue about the act itself.
    Must admit I like the occasional story where the hero and heroine discover life and love together or where the heroine is the more experienced one as a break from the all-knowing, all-orgasms-all-the-time kind of hero — a bit of variety to make my reading more interesting.

    Reply
  134. I think that then, as now, how much knowledge the aristocratic heroine had would depend. It would depend on whether she had sisters or friends who didn’t want her to go to the marriage bed as ignorant as they were (mothers might feel that way but be far more constrained in what they told their daughters). It would depend on whether the gossips at her first ball spoke far too openly, not knowing she was standing on the other side of the potted palm. It would depend on whether she had brothers whom she saw unclothed or accidentally walked in on as they were tupping the maid. OTOH, she might easily understand the differences in anatomy but have no clue about the act itself.
    Must admit I like the occasional story where the hero and heroine discover life and love together or where the heroine is the more experienced one as a break from the all-knowing, all-orgasms-all-the-time kind of hero — a bit of variety to make my reading more interesting.

    Reply
  135. I think that then, as now, how much knowledge the aristocratic heroine had would depend. It would depend on whether she had sisters or friends who didn’t want her to go to the marriage bed as ignorant as they were (mothers might feel that way but be far more constrained in what they told their daughters). It would depend on whether the gossips at her first ball spoke far too openly, not knowing she was standing on the other side of the potted palm. It would depend on whether she had brothers whom she saw unclothed or accidentally walked in on as they were tupping the maid. OTOH, she might easily understand the differences in anatomy but have no clue about the act itself.
    Must admit I like the occasional story where the hero and heroine discover life and love together or where the heroine is the more experienced one as a break from the all-knowing, all-orgasms-all-the-time kind of hero — a bit of variety to make my reading more interesting.

    Reply
  136. Today we have so much access to information. But in the past what a person knew was probably very dependent on what they could learn from others. For the males, they probably had more opportunity thru friends with connections, older women, courtesans who would “teach” younger men. For girls it was probably dependent on if anyone would talk to them – mothers, sisters, nannies, friends, other open women; or if they lived in the countryside where animals were bred. If they were intelligent and looked for the information, they could probably find it. That is the style of heroine I find the most fun.

    Reply
  137. Today we have so much access to information. But in the past what a person knew was probably very dependent on what they could learn from others. For the males, they probably had more opportunity thru friends with connections, older women, courtesans who would “teach” younger men. For girls it was probably dependent on if anyone would talk to them – mothers, sisters, nannies, friends, other open women; or if they lived in the countryside where animals were bred. If they were intelligent and looked for the information, they could probably find it. That is the style of heroine I find the most fun.

    Reply
  138. Today we have so much access to information. But in the past what a person knew was probably very dependent on what they could learn from others. For the males, they probably had more opportunity thru friends with connections, older women, courtesans who would “teach” younger men. For girls it was probably dependent on if anyone would talk to them – mothers, sisters, nannies, friends, other open women; or if they lived in the countryside where animals were bred. If they were intelligent and looked for the information, they could probably find it. That is the style of heroine I find the most fun.

    Reply
  139. Today we have so much access to information. But in the past what a person knew was probably very dependent on what they could learn from others. For the males, they probably had more opportunity thru friends with connections, older women, courtesans who would “teach” younger men. For girls it was probably dependent on if anyone would talk to them – mothers, sisters, nannies, friends, other open women; or if they lived in the countryside where animals were bred. If they were intelligent and looked for the information, they could probably find it. That is the style of heroine I find the most fun.

    Reply
  140. Today we have so much access to information. But in the past what a person knew was probably very dependent on what they could learn from others. For the males, they probably had more opportunity thru friends with connections, older women, courtesans who would “teach” younger men. For girls it was probably dependent on if anyone would talk to them – mothers, sisters, nannies, friends, other open women; or if they lived in the countryside where animals were bred. If they were intelligent and looked for the information, they could probably find it. That is the style of heroine I find the most fun.

    Reply
  141. I feel that to often in some author’s books today (not the above authors of course), Sexual scenes are acted out in ways that a YOUNG virgin would NOT have done.
    Furthermore, in many new historical novels, Sex is used more and more as a sop to make the reader forgive that the plot is weak and or non-existant.
    One recent book even made me thing that just because the heroine did sex in the public (but not seen by the public near-by)–that decided her and the hero that they were meant for each other–BAH Humbug!
    I’ve read book with little sex scenes that were very sensual in the simering feelings the characters had for each other. And I would hope that some people in this era did hold out for marriage!

    Reply
  142. I feel that to often in some author’s books today (not the above authors of course), Sexual scenes are acted out in ways that a YOUNG virgin would NOT have done.
    Furthermore, in many new historical novels, Sex is used more and more as a sop to make the reader forgive that the plot is weak and or non-existant.
    One recent book even made me thing that just because the heroine did sex in the public (but not seen by the public near-by)–that decided her and the hero that they were meant for each other–BAH Humbug!
    I’ve read book with little sex scenes that were very sensual in the simering feelings the characters had for each other. And I would hope that some people in this era did hold out for marriage!

    Reply
  143. I feel that to often in some author’s books today (not the above authors of course), Sexual scenes are acted out in ways that a YOUNG virgin would NOT have done.
    Furthermore, in many new historical novels, Sex is used more and more as a sop to make the reader forgive that the plot is weak and or non-existant.
    One recent book even made me thing that just because the heroine did sex in the public (but not seen by the public near-by)–that decided her and the hero that they were meant for each other–BAH Humbug!
    I’ve read book with little sex scenes that were very sensual in the simering feelings the characters had for each other. And I would hope that some people in this era did hold out for marriage!

    Reply
  144. I feel that to often in some author’s books today (not the above authors of course), Sexual scenes are acted out in ways that a YOUNG virgin would NOT have done.
    Furthermore, in many new historical novels, Sex is used more and more as a sop to make the reader forgive that the plot is weak and or non-existant.
    One recent book even made me thing that just because the heroine did sex in the public (but not seen by the public near-by)–that decided her and the hero that they were meant for each other–BAH Humbug!
    I’ve read book with little sex scenes that were very sensual in the simering feelings the characters had for each other. And I would hope that some people in this era did hold out for marriage!

    Reply
  145. I feel that to often in some author’s books today (not the above authors of course), Sexual scenes are acted out in ways that a YOUNG virgin would NOT have done.
    Furthermore, in many new historical novels, Sex is used more and more as a sop to make the reader forgive that the plot is weak and or non-existant.
    One recent book even made me thing that just because the heroine did sex in the public (but not seen by the public near-by)–that decided her and the hero that they were meant for each other–BAH Humbug!
    I’ve read book with little sex scenes that were very sensual in the simering feelings the characters had for each other. And I would hope that some people in this era did hold out for marriage!

    Reply
  146. I think today there is more knowledge of sex then there use to be because people are more open with it then before. I really don’t feel cheated if there is no sex in a book. Some books just don’t go that far but if everything I read was that way I would feel cheated.

    Reply
  147. I think today there is more knowledge of sex then there use to be because people are more open with it then before. I really don’t feel cheated if there is no sex in a book. Some books just don’t go that far but if everything I read was that way I would feel cheated.

    Reply
  148. I think today there is more knowledge of sex then there use to be because people are more open with it then before. I really don’t feel cheated if there is no sex in a book. Some books just don’t go that far but if everything I read was that way I would feel cheated.

    Reply
  149. I think today there is more knowledge of sex then there use to be because people are more open with it then before. I really don’t feel cheated if there is no sex in a book. Some books just don’t go that far but if everything I read was that way I would feel cheated.

    Reply
  150. I think today there is more knowledge of sex then there use to be because people are more open with it then before. I really don’t feel cheated if there is no sex in a book. Some books just don’t go that far but if everything I read was that way I would feel cheated.

    Reply
  151. I would think that like now women in all time periods are really seeking an emotional connection with the man and find sex is the only way to have it. When a writer shows this growing need for an emotional connection in the character is when I’m absorbed into the story and find myself going right along with the heroine in desiring this connection. Once they start the body will take over and physical desire will grow. There will always be women, like men, who seem driven by their desire for not only the pleasure it gives but also the power it gives them over their partner. For them it’s not about emotional connection. I cannot get into those characters.

    Reply
  152. I would think that like now women in all time periods are really seeking an emotional connection with the man and find sex is the only way to have it. When a writer shows this growing need for an emotional connection in the character is when I’m absorbed into the story and find myself going right along with the heroine in desiring this connection. Once they start the body will take over and physical desire will grow. There will always be women, like men, who seem driven by their desire for not only the pleasure it gives but also the power it gives them over their partner. For them it’s not about emotional connection. I cannot get into those characters.

    Reply
  153. I would think that like now women in all time periods are really seeking an emotional connection with the man and find sex is the only way to have it. When a writer shows this growing need for an emotional connection in the character is when I’m absorbed into the story and find myself going right along with the heroine in desiring this connection. Once they start the body will take over and physical desire will grow. There will always be women, like men, who seem driven by their desire for not only the pleasure it gives but also the power it gives them over their partner. For them it’s not about emotional connection. I cannot get into those characters.

    Reply
  154. I would think that like now women in all time periods are really seeking an emotional connection with the man and find sex is the only way to have it. When a writer shows this growing need for an emotional connection in the character is when I’m absorbed into the story and find myself going right along with the heroine in desiring this connection. Once they start the body will take over and physical desire will grow. There will always be women, like men, who seem driven by their desire for not only the pleasure it gives but also the power it gives them over their partner. For them it’s not about emotional connection. I cannot get into those characters.

    Reply
  155. I would think that like now women in all time periods are really seeking an emotional connection with the man and find sex is the only way to have it. When a writer shows this growing need for an emotional connection in the character is when I’m absorbed into the story and find myself going right along with the heroine in desiring this connection. Once they start the body will take over and physical desire will grow. There will always be women, like men, who seem driven by their desire for not only the pleasure it gives but also the power it gives them over their partner. For them it’s not about emotional connection. I cannot get into those characters.

    Reply
  156. I don’t mind sex scenes or the lack of them. What I do object to is when they’re unrealistic. One of my pet peeves, which I’ve come across several times, is when the heroine has waist length hair, which the hero spreads out around her and over the pillow before getting going with anything else. As the once-owner of long hair, I can tell you she’s not going to be thrilling to the feel of his touch when she’s going something along the lines of ‘ow! you’re on my hair!’ ‘Ouch! you’re on my hair again!’ gritted teeth ‘Get off my hair!’ ‘Oh, will you just get out of the way so I can get up and plait it!’

    Reply
  157. I don’t mind sex scenes or the lack of them. What I do object to is when they’re unrealistic. One of my pet peeves, which I’ve come across several times, is when the heroine has waist length hair, which the hero spreads out around her and over the pillow before getting going with anything else. As the once-owner of long hair, I can tell you she’s not going to be thrilling to the feel of his touch when she’s going something along the lines of ‘ow! you’re on my hair!’ ‘Ouch! you’re on my hair again!’ gritted teeth ‘Get off my hair!’ ‘Oh, will you just get out of the way so I can get up and plait it!’

    Reply
  158. I don’t mind sex scenes or the lack of them. What I do object to is when they’re unrealistic. One of my pet peeves, which I’ve come across several times, is when the heroine has waist length hair, which the hero spreads out around her and over the pillow before getting going with anything else. As the once-owner of long hair, I can tell you she’s not going to be thrilling to the feel of his touch when she’s going something along the lines of ‘ow! you’re on my hair!’ ‘Ouch! you’re on my hair again!’ gritted teeth ‘Get off my hair!’ ‘Oh, will you just get out of the way so I can get up and plait it!’

    Reply
  159. I don’t mind sex scenes or the lack of them. What I do object to is when they’re unrealistic. One of my pet peeves, which I’ve come across several times, is when the heroine has waist length hair, which the hero spreads out around her and over the pillow before getting going with anything else. As the once-owner of long hair, I can tell you she’s not going to be thrilling to the feel of his touch when she’s going something along the lines of ‘ow! you’re on my hair!’ ‘Ouch! you’re on my hair again!’ gritted teeth ‘Get off my hair!’ ‘Oh, will you just get out of the way so I can get up and plait it!’

    Reply
  160. I don’t mind sex scenes or the lack of them. What I do object to is when they’re unrealistic. One of my pet peeves, which I’ve come across several times, is when the heroine has waist length hair, which the hero spreads out around her and over the pillow before getting going with anything else. As the once-owner of long hair, I can tell you she’s not going to be thrilling to the feel of his touch when she’s going something along the lines of ‘ow! you’re on my hair!’ ‘Ouch! you’re on my hair again!’ gritted teeth ‘Get off my hair!’ ‘Oh, will you just get out of the way so I can get up and plait it!’

    Reply
  161. Interesting comments. I think we’re all quite individual about our preferences for fictional sex. Liz, I had long hair when young and I certainly didn’t plait it. It was part of the fun, but you’re right, there had to be a certain amount of care. Height differences lead to different preferences, too.
    Personally, it’s hard to get me to appreciate fictional sex in a hot climate.
    Jo

    Reply
  162. Interesting comments. I think we’re all quite individual about our preferences for fictional sex. Liz, I had long hair when young and I certainly didn’t plait it. It was part of the fun, but you’re right, there had to be a certain amount of care. Height differences lead to different preferences, too.
    Personally, it’s hard to get me to appreciate fictional sex in a hot climate.
    Jo

    Reply
  163. Interesting comments. I think we’re all quite individual about our preferences for fictional sex. Liz, I had long hair when young and I certainly didn’t plait it. It was part of the fun, but you’re right, there had to be a certain amount of care. Height differences lead to different preferences, too.
    Personally, it’s hard to get me to appreciate fictional sex in a hot climate.
    Jo

    Reply
  164. Interesting comments. I think we’re all quite individual about our preferences for fictional sex. Liz, I had long hair when young and I certainly didn’t plait it. It was part of the fun, but you’re right, there had to be a certain amount of care. Height differences lead to different preferences, too.
    Personally, it’s hard to get me to appreciate fictional sex in a hot climate.
    Jo

    Reply
  165. Interesting comments. I think we’re all quite individual about our preferences for fictional sex. Liz, I had long hair when young and I certainly didn’t plait it. It was part of the fun, but you’re right, there had to be a certain amount of care. Height differences lead to different preferences, too.
    Personally, it’s hard to get me to appreciate fictional sex in a hot climate.
    Jo

    Reply

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