Personal Space

Susanna_Kearsley_Writing_Room_Two
Susanna here. I’m still on deadline, meaning most days find me shut up in my writing room away from everybody else. It’s never easy on my family, when I’m at this stage of working on a novel. Mealtimes suffer, dustballs roll, and even when I’m right there with them I’m not really there.

I always suffer pangs of guilt. Until my desk reminds me not to.

Let me tell you why.


My father, an only child, became a husband at 21 and a dad at 23, and from age 26 had a wife and two daughters. Even our dog was a girl. But he never complained. Never joked about being “outnumbered”. He was, and is, an awesome dad.
 
Our Family ca 1973His job as an engineer meant that we moved a lot—a few years here, a few years there. We lived in ordinary houses—cozy and nice, but not huge. Most had one bathroom and three bedrooms. Filled with much love and occasional mayhem.

For as long as I can remember, my dad in his quiet way tried to carve out a small space for himself in our various homes.
 
Nothing big. Nothing greedy. Just one little space for himself, where he could sit in peace and do his genealogy. Somewhere along the way he even found himself an old oak table to use as a desk, the perfect size. But there was rarely anywhere for him to put it. In the whole of my childhood the closest he came was a tiny little “office” in the basement that had room for that oak table and a filing cabinet and nothing more, wedged in between the room where we played ping pong and the laundry room. It wasn’t really what I’d have called “peaceful”.

Daddy and MeThen we moved again. And then again, this time to an apartment overseas, which meant our things—my father’s desk included—were packed into storage for two years. There wouldn’t have been anywhere to put it anyway, because my sister and myself, being now teenagers, claimed every inch of space we could.
 
Eventually, after a couple more moves, when my sister & I left the nest, my dad got a small closet-like room off the dining room, just for himself. With a door.
 
Of course, this was right when I finished my first novel, and my parents, always supportive, let me move back home and gave me a room of my own while I waitressed and tried to get published.
But this meant my dad’s private space was now shared with me. That’s where I wrote. And he never complained.

Now, in his 70s, he finally has his own separate office space in their apartment. He might let his grandchildren sleep there sometimes, and he lets me go in with my laptop and write there if I need to work while I’m visiting, but it’s indisputably his.

Susanna_Kearsley_Writing_Room_ThreeAnd I, as the desk in my writing room here at my own house, use that old oak table my dad moved from house to house for all those years.
 
It reminds me, each day, of the value of having that space of our own. Even when others don’t understand why we need it.

Do you have a place in your house or apartment that's all your own? What does it look like, and what does it mean to you?

115 thoughts on “Personal Space”

  1. I come from a highly dysfunctional family that never did chummy, normal, family things. We always scattered to our individual spaces. My sister and I always had desks in our rooms for homework I suppose, but it did all sorts of other jobs as well. I was a prolific journal keeper and wrote lots of very long letters (hindsight: I wonder if my mother ever wished I was paying my own postage). My father was a pastor and a mechanic so he had hidey holes at two locations and my mother had a “dressing room” that she at her hiding spot in. As an adult, I have a desk, but I will admit to doing more things curled up on the sofa with my iPad then at the desk these days. The joy of only having to share space with a hubby and not people who wanted to argue etc. 🙂 I always love your family stories, the love you share is always evident. I’m sending you Godspeed on your deadline 😉

    Reply
  2. I come from a highly dysfunctional family that never did chummy, normal, family things. We always scattered to our individual spaces. My sister and I always had desks in our rooms for homework I suppose, but it did all sorts of other jobs as well. I was a prolific journal keeper and wrote lots of very long letters (hindsight: I wonder if my mother ever wished I was paying my own postage). My father was a pastor and a mechanic so he had hidey holes at two locations and my mother had a “dressing room” that she at her hiding spot in. As an adult, I have a desk, but I will admit to doing more things curled up on the sofa with my iPad then at the desk these days. The joy of only having to share space with a hubby and not people who wanted to argue etc. 🙂 I always love your family stories, the love you share is always evident. I’m sending you Godspeed on your deadline 😉

    Reply
  3. I come from a highly dysfunctional family that never did chummy, normal, family things. We always scattered to our individual spaces. My sister and I always had desks in our rooms for homework I suppose, but it did all sorts of other jobs as well. I was a prolific journal keeper and wrote lots of very long letters (hindsight: I wonder if my mother ever wished I was paying my own postage). My father was a pastor and a mechanic so he had hidey holes at two locations and my mother had a “dressing room” that she at her hiding spot in. As an adult, I have a desk, but I will admit to doing more things curled up on the sofa with my iPad then at the desk these days. The joy of only having to share space with a hubby and not people who wanted to argue etc. 🙂 I always love your family stories, the love you share is always evident. I’m sending you Godspeed on your deadline 😉

    Reply
  4. I come from a highly dysfunctional family that never did chummy, normal, family things. We always scattered to our individual spaces. My sister and I always had desks in our rooms for homework I suppose, but it did all sorts of other jobs as well. I was a prolific journal keeper and wrote lots of very long letters (hindsight: I wonder if my mother ever wished I was paying my own postage). My father was a pastor and a mechanic so he had hidey holes at two locations and my mother had a “dressing room” that she at her hiding spot in. As an adult, I have a desk, but I will admit to doing more things curled up on the sofa with my iPad then at the desk these days. The joy of only having to share space with a hubby and not people who wanted to argue etc. 🙂 I always love your family stories, the love you share is always evident. I’m sending you Godspeed on your deadline 😉

    Reply
  5. I come from a highly dysfunctional family that never did chummy, normal, family things. We always scattered to our individual spaces. My sister and I always had desks in our rooms for homework I suppose, but it did all sorts of other jobs as well. I was a prolific journal keeper and wrote lots of very long letters (hindsight: I wonder if my mother ever wished I was paying my own postage). My father was a pastor and a mechanic so he had hidey holes at two locations and my mother had a “dressing room” that she at her hiding spot in. As an adult, I have a desk, but I will admit to doing more things curled up on the sofa with my iPad then at the desk these days. The joy of only having to share space with a hubby and not people who wanted to argue etc. 🙂 I always love your family stories, the love you share is always evident. I’m sending you Godspeed on your deadline 😉

    Reply
  6. I just moved into a new home and, while I haven’t yet created my personal writing space, I have designated it. My husband and I are sans children, but we bought a 3 bedroom 2 bath specifically so I could have a writing room, he could have his own bathroom, and we still had a guest bedroom.
    I can’t wait to fill it. I’m buying stuff from Ikea to build a desk and mounting shelves on the wall.

    Reply
  7. I just moved into a new home and, while I haven’t yet created my personal writing space, I have designated it. My husband and I are sans children, but we bought a 3 bedroom 2 bath specifically so I could have a writing room, he could have his own bathroom, and we still had a guest bedroom.
    I can’t wait to fill it. I’m buying stuff from Ikea to build a desk and mounting shelves on the wall.

    Reply
  8. I just moved into a new home and, while I haven’t yet created my personal writing space, I have designated it. My husband and I are sans children, but we bought a 3 bedroom 2 bath specifically so I could have a writing room, he could have his own bathroom, and we still had a guest bedroom.
    I can’t wait to fill it. I’m buying stuff from Ikea to build a desk and mounting shelves on the wall.

    Reply
  9. I just moved into a new home and, while I haven’t yet created my personal writing space, I have designated it. My husband and I are sans children, but we bought a 3 bedroom 2 bath specifically so I could have a writing room, he could have his own bathroom, and we still had a guest bedroom.
    I can’t wait to fill it. I’m buying stuff from Ikea to build a desk and mounting shelves on the wall.

    Reply
  10. I just moved into a new home and, while I haven’t yet created my personal writing space, I have designated it. My husband and I are sans children, but we bought a 3 bedroom 2 bath specifically so I could have a writing room, he could have his own bathroom, and we still had a guest bedroom.
    I can’t wait to fill it. I’m buying stuff from Ikea to build a desk and mounting shelves on the wall.

    Reply
  11. I’ve pretty much always has my own space, even most of the time in college dormitories. Things would get ugly if I didn’t. Now I have the whole top floor, the Mayhem consultant has the spacious finished basement, and we meet in the middle. *G* Your dad does indeed sound awesome!

    Reply
  12. I’ve pretty much always has my own space, even most of the time in college dormitories. Things would get ugly if I didn’t. Now I have the whole top floor, the Mayhem consultant has the spacious finished basement, and we meet in the middle. *G* Your dad does indeed sound awesome!

    Reply
  13. I’ve pretty much always has my own space, even most of the time in college dormitories. Things would get ugly if I didn’t. Now I have the whole top floor, the Mayhem consultant has the spacious finished basement, and we meet in the middle. *G* Your dad does indeed sound awesome!

    Reply
  14. I’ve pretty much always has my own space, even most of the time in college dormitories. Things would get ugly if I didn’t. Now I have the whole top floor, the Mayhem consultant has the spacious finished basement, and we meet in the middle. *G* Your dad does indeed sound awesome!

    Reply
  15. I’ve pretty much always has my own space, even most of the time in college dormitories. Things would get ugly if I didn’t. Now I have the whole top floor, the Mayhem consultant has the spacious finished basement, and we meet in the middle. *G* Your dad does indeed sound awesome!

    Reply
  16. I’ve had my own space for as long as I can remember, for homework, reading, whatever. Since moving back in with my parents as a caregiver 11 years ago, after years of being on my own or being married with my own space, though, it’s become so much more necessary and I’ve started guarding and valuing it so much more. After a long day with my dad, who knows all the buttons to push to wind me up, I can’t wait to retreat to the peaceful solitude of my basement. Unfortunately, I don’t spend enough time in it, so it needs some serious attention. But I desperately need that space daily, even if just to sleep for a couple of hours!

    Reply
  17. I’ve had my own space for as long as I can remember, for homework, reading, whatever. Since moving back in with my parents as a caregiver 11 years ago, after years of being on my own or being married with my own space, though, it’s become so much more necessary and I’ve started guarding and valuing it so much more. After a long day with my dad, who knows all the buttons to push to wind me up, I can’t wait to retreat to the peaceful solitude of my basement. Unfortunately, I don’t spend enough time in it, so it needs some serious attention. But I desperately need that space daily, even if just to sleep for a couple of hours!

    Reply
  18. I’ve had my own space for as long as I can remember, for homework, reading, whatever. Since moving back in with my parents as a caregiver 11 years ago, after years of being on my own or being married with my own space, though, it’s become so much more necessary and I’ve started guarding and valuing it so much more. After a long day with my dad, who knows all the buttons to push to wind me up, I can’t wait to retreat to the peaceful solitude of my basement. Unfortunately, I don’t spend enough time in it, so it needs some serious attention. But I desperately need that space daily, even if just to sleep for a couple of hours!

    Reply
  19. I’ve had my own space for as long as I can remember, for homework, reading, whatever. Since moving back in with my parents as a caregiver 11 years ago, after years of being on my own or being married with my own space, though, it’s become so much more necessary and I’ve started guarding and valuing it so much more. After a long day with my dad, who knows all the buttons to push to wind me up, I can’t wait to retreat to the peaceful solitude of my basement. Unfortunately, I don’t spend enough time in it, so it needs some serious attention. But I desperately need that space daily, even if just to sleep for a couple of hours!

    Reply
  20. I’ve had my own space for as long as I can remember, for homework, reading, whatever. Since moving back in with my parents as a caregiver 11 years ago, after years of being on my own or being married with my own space, though, it’s become so much more necessary and I’ve started guarding and valuing it so much more. After a long day with my dad, who knows all the buttons to push to wind me up, I can’t wait to retreat to the peaceful solitude of my basement. Unfortunately, I don’t spend enough time in it, so it needs some serious attention. But I desperately need that space daily, even if just to sleep for a couple of hours!

    Reply
  21. I gave up my own space when we moved this last time and though it’s just the two of us and we have three bedrooms, two are upstairs and I don’t do stairs well. I’ve put so much time into trying to make a house I hate into one I can stand, I haven’t thought much about having a space of my own again, but it would have to be upstairs and I’m not ready for that yet 🙁
    Your dad sounds like a treasure! I had my room growing up. That was it. And I hid in it often when my dad was really drinking. As an only, I miss my alone time more than a space of my own. They’re different.

    Reply
  22. I gave up my own space when we moved this last time and though it’s just the two of us and we have three bedrooms, two are upstairs and I don’t do stairs well. I’ve put so much time into trying to make a house I hate into one I can stand, I haven’t thought much about having a space of my own again, but it would have to be upstairs and I’m not ready for that yet 🙁
    Your dad sounds like a treasure! I had my room growing up. That was it. And I hid in it often when my dad was really drinking. As an only, I miss my alone time more than a space of my own. They’re different.

    Reply
  23. I gave up my own space when we moved this last time and though it’s just the two of us and we have three bedrooms, two are upstairs and I don’t do stairs well. I’ve put so much time into trying to make a house I hate into one I can stand, I haven’t thought much about having a space of my own again, but it would have to be upstairs and I’m not ready for that yet 🙁
    Your dad sounds like a treasure! I had my room growing up. That was it. And I hid in it often when my dad was really drinking. As an only, I miss my alone time more than a space of my own. They’re different.

    Reply
  24. I gave up my own space when we moved this last time and though it’s just the two of us and we have three bedrooms, two are upstairs and I don’t do stairs well. I’ve put so much time into trying to make a house I hate into one I can stand, I haven’t thought much about having a space of my own again, but it would have to be upstairs and I’m not ready for that yet 🙁
    Your dad sounds like a treasure! I had my room growing up. That was it. And I hid in it often when my dad was really drinking. As an only, I miss my alone time more than a space of my own. They’re different.

    Reply
  25. I gave up my own space when we moved this last time and though it’s just the two of us and we have three bedrooms, two are upstairs and I don’t do stairs well. I’ve put so much time into trying to make a house I hate into one I can stand, I haven’t thought much about having a space of my own again, but it would have to be upstairs and I’m not ready for that yet 🙁
    Your dad sounds like a treasure! I had my room growing up. That was it. And I hid in it often when my dad was really drinking. As an only, I miss my alone time more than a space of my own. They’re different.

    Reply
  26. When I was a kid, I never had a space to call my own — it was always a shared bedroom, or a bedroom that belonged to an older sibling. For me, the outdoors provided my private space, under a big pine tree, where I built a “fort” of pine-needles, and the dog and I would hide there, or up in a tree — I was very fond of sitting in a tree — the dog, not so much. Eventually I learned to build a private space inside my head.
    These days, of course, I have plenty of private space, but still, I can work almost anywhere. But, like Theo (above) I need my alone time.

    Reply
  27. When I was a kid, I never had a space to call my own — it was always a shared bedroom, or a bedroom that belonged to an older sibling. For me, the outdoors provided my private space, under a big pine tree, where I built a “fort” of pine-needles, and the dog and I would hide there, or up in a tree — I was very fond of sitting in a tree — the dog, not so much. Eventually I learned to build a private space inside my head.
    These days, of course, I have plenty of private space, but still, I can work almost anywhere. But, like Theo (above) I need my alone time.

    Reply
  28. When I was a kid, I never had a space to call my own — it was always a shared bedroom, or a bedroom that belonged to an older sibling. For me, the outdoors provided my private space, under a big pine tree, where I built a “fort” of pine-needles, and the dog and I would hide there, or up in a tree — I was very fond of sitting in a tree — the dog, not so much. Eventually I learned to build a private space inside my head.
    These days, of course, I have plenty of private space, but still, I can work almost anywhere. But, like Theo (above) I need my alone time.

    Reply
  29. When I was a kid, I never had a space to call my own — it was always a shared bedroom, or a bedroom that belonged to an older sibling. For me, the outdoors provided my private space, under a big pine tree, where I built a “fort” of pine-needles, and the dog and I would hide there, or up in a tree — I was very fond of sitting in a tree — the dog, not so much. Eventually I learned to build a private space inside my head.
    These days, of course, I have plenty of private space, but still, I can work almost anywhere. But, like Theo (above) I need my alone time.

    Reply
  30. When I was a kid, I never had a space to call my own — it was always a shared bedroom, or a bedroom that belonged to an older sibling. For me, the outdoors provided my private space, under a big pine tree, where I built a “fort” of pine-needles, and the dog and I would hide there, or up in a tree — I was very fond of sitting in a tree — the dog, not so much. Eventually I learned to build a private space inside my head.
    These days, of course, I have plenty of private space, but still, I can work almost anywhere. But, like Theo (above) I need my alone time.

    Reply
  31. I had my own room since the next 5 kids in the family were boys. My “baby” sister was born way too late for me to share as I am 12 years older. Now, as mom, I have a reading chair in the living room with a good light and an ottoman. There is a dog bed right next to me. and my rolling laptop table is within easy reach. It’s my “control center”. The kids are all in their teens now. When they were little, it was a table in the family room or the kitchen.

    Reply
  32. I had my own room since the next 5 kids in the family were boys. My “baby” sister was born way too late for me to share as I am 12 years older. Now, as mom, I have a reading chair in the living room with a good light and an ottoman. There is a dog bed right next to me. and my rolling laptop table is within easy reach. It’s my “control center”. The kids are all in their teens now. When they were little, it was a table in the family room or the kitchen.

    Reply
  33. I had my own room since the next 5 kids in the family were boys. My “baby” sister was born way too late for me to share as I am 12 years older. Now, as mom, I have a reading chair in the living room with a good light and an ottoman. There is a dog bed right next to me. and my rolling laptop table is within easy reach. It’s my “control center”. The kids are all in their teens now. When they were little, it was a table in the family room or the kitchen.

    Reply
  34. I had my own room since the next 5 kids in the family were boys. My “baby” sister was born way too late for me to share as I am 12 years older. Now, as mom, I have a reading chair in the living room with a good light and an ottoman. There is a dog bed right next to me. and my rolling laptop table is within easy reach. It’s my “control center”. The kids are all in their teens now. When they were little, it was a table in the family room or the kitchen.

    Reply
  35. I had my own room since the next 5 kids in the family were boys. My “baby” sister was born way too late for me to share as I am 12 years older. Now, as mom, I have a reading chair in the living room with a good light and an ottoman. There is a dog bed right next to me. and my rolling laptop table is within easy reach. It’s my “control center”. The kids are all in their teens now. When they were little, it was a table in the family room or the kitchen.

    Reply
  36. As a child, I shared a room with my sister. When we were really little, we even shared a bed which was wonderful on cold nights! We got a bit older and we moved into a place with such narrow kids’ rooms that we had to have bunk beds. Many a night we both slept on one bed – until the night I rolled off the top bunk! Guess we were too big to share. But then she moved out and I had my own room. Then towards the end of highschool, I had to share again – this time with my younger brother. By this time I needed my own space! My top bunk became my space. For the past 33+ years I’ve shared with hubby but he’s now got his ‘office/cave’ and our room became my private space.
    He’s an introvert so needs his space to hide – he freely states, “I’m going to go hide in my cave.” I go sit on our bed with the wonderful laptop lapdesk he made me. Just the right height. Or I read or just have a nap. But even though I’m an extrovert, I have to have my space.

    Reply
  37. As a child, I shared a room with my sister. When we were really little, we even shared a bed which was wonderful on cold nights! We got a bit older and we moved into a place with such narrow kids’ rooms that we had to have bunk beds. Many a night we both slept on one bed – until the night I rolled off the top bunk! Guess we were too big to share. But then she moved out and I had my own room. Then towards the end of highschool, I had to share again – this time with my younger brother. By this time I needed my own space! My top bunk became my space. For the past 33+ years I’ve shared with hubby but he’s now got his ‘office/cave’ and our room became my private space.
    He’s an introvert so needs his space to hide – he freely states, “I’m going to go hide in my cave.” I go sit on our bed with the wonderful laptop lapdesk he made me. Just the right height. Or I read or just have a nap. But even though I’m an extrovert, I have to have my space.

    Reply
  38. As a child, I shared a room with my sister. When we were really little, we even shared a bed which was wonderful on cold nights! We got a bit older and we moved into a place with such narrow kids’ rooms that we had to have bunk beds. Many a night we both slept on one bed – until the night I rolled off the top bunk! Guess we were too big to share. But then she moved out and I had my own room. Then towards the end of highschool, I had to share again – this time with my younger brother. By this time I needed my own space! My top bunk became my space. For the past 33+ years I’ve shared with hubby but he’s now got his ‘office/cave’ and our room became my private space.
    He’s an introvert so needs his space to hide – he freely states, “I’m going to go hide in my cave.” I go sit on our bed with the wonderful laptop lapdesk he made me. Just the right height. Or I read or just have a nap. But even though I’m an extrovert, I have to have my space.

    Reply
  39. As a child, I shared a room with my sister. When we were really little, we even shared a bed which was wonderful on cold nights! We got a bit older and we moved into a place with such narrow kids’ rooms that we had to have bunk beds. Many a night we both slept on one bed – until the night I rolled off the top bunk! Guess we were too big to share. But then she moved out and I had my own room. Then towards the end of highschool, I had to share again – this time with my younger brother. By this time I needed my own space! My top bunk became my space. For the past 33+ years I’ve shared with hubby but he’s now got his ‘office/cave’ and our room became my private space.
    He’s an introvert so needs his space to hide – he freely states, “I’m going to go hide in my cave.” I go sit on our bed with the wonderful laptop lapdesk he made me. Just the right height. Or I read or just have a nap. But even though I’m an extrovert, I have to have my space.

    Reply
  40. As a child, I shared a room with my sister. When we were really little, we even shared a bed which was wonderful on cold nights! We got a bit older and we moved into a place with such narrow kids’ rooms that we had to have bunk beds. Many a night we both slept on one bed – until the night I rolled off the top bunk! Guess we were too big to share. But then she moved out and I had my own room. Then towards the end of highschool, I had to share again – this time with my younger brother. By this time I needed my own space! My top bunk became my space. For the past 33+ years I’ve shared with hubby but he’s now got his ‘office/cave’ and our room became my private space.
    He’s an introvert so needs his space to hide – he freely states, “I’m going to go hide in my cave.” I go sit on our bed with the wonderful laptop lapdesk he made me. Just the right height. Or I read or just have a nap. But even though I’m an extrovert, I have to have my space.

    Reply
  41. Laura, I love that your husband wants his own bathroom, too 🙂 You’ll have fun decorating your writing room. My bookshelves, in the photo at the top, are Ikea ones (with extra shelf on top). They’re stacked three deep, in places (but I don’t tell my husband that–he’s already convinced the whole house is going to start leaning because of my bookshelves…)

    Reply
  42. Laura, I love that your husband wants his own bathroom, too 🙂 You’ll have fun decorating your writing room. My bookshelves, in the photo at the top, are Ikea ones (with extra shelf on top). They’re stacked three deep, in places (but I don’t tell my husband that–he’s already convinced the whole house is going to start leaning because of my bookshelves…)

    Reply
  43. Laura, I love that your husband wants his own bathroom, too 🙂 You’ll have fun decorating your writing room. My bookshelves, in the photo at the top, are Ikea ones (with extra shelf on top). They’re stacked three deep, in places (but I don’t tell my husband that–he’s already convinced the whole house is going to start leaning because of my bookshelves…)

    Reply
  44. Laura, I love that your husband wants his own bathroom, too 🙂 You’ll have fun decorating your writing room. My bookshelves, in the photo at the top, are Ikea ones (with extra shelf on top). They’re stacked three deep, in places (but I don’t tell my husband that–he’s already convinced the whole house is going to start leaning because of my bookshelves…)

    Reply
  45. Laura, I love that your husband wants his own bathroom, too 🙂 You’ll have fun decorating your writing room. My bookshelves, in the photo at the top, are Ikea ones (with extra shelf on top). They’re stacked three deep, in places (but I don’t tell my husband that–he’s already convinced the whole house is going to start leaning because of my bookshelves…)

    Reply
  46. Theo, you’re so right about alone time. I lived on my own for years, and I do still crave moments of absolute solitude. At least the kids are old enough now that I can close the bathroom door again 🙂

    Reply
  47. Theo, you’re so right about alone time. I lived on my own for years, and I do still crave moments of absolute solitude. At least the kids are old enough now that I can close the bathroom door again 🙂

    Reply
  48. Theo, you’re so right about alone time. I lived on my own for years, and I do still crave moments of absolute solitude. At least the kids are old enough now that I can close the bathroom door again 🙂

    Reply
  49. Theo, you’re so right about alone time. I lived on my own for years, and I do still crave moments of absolute solitude. At least the kids are old enough now that I can close the bathroom door again 🙂

    Reply
  50. Theo, you’re so right about alone time. I lived on my own for years, and I do still crave moments of absolute solitude. At least the kids are old enough now that I can close the bathroom door again 🙂

    Reply
  51. Karen, my sister and I always had separate rooms (she was the elder, and it was more than my life was worth to venture into her space or touch her record collection 🙂 I always thought sharing would be fun.

    Reply
  52. Karen, my sister and I always had separate rooms (she was the elder, and it was more than my life was worth to venture into her space or touch her record collection 🙂 I always thought sharing would be fun.

    Reply
  53. Karen, my sister and I always had separate rooms (she was the elder, and it was more than my life was worth to venture into her space or touch her record collection 🙂 I always thought sharing would be fun.

    Reply
  54. Karen, my sister and I always had separate rooms (she was the elder, and it was more than my life was worth to venture into her space or touch her record collection 🙂 I always thought sharing would be fun.

    Reply
  55. Karen, my sister and I always had separate rooms (she was the elder, and it was more than my life was worth to venture into her space or touch her record collection 🙂 I always thought sharing would be fun.

    Reply
  56. I’m th eldest of five girls and the mother of four kids so I am used to creating space in my head. Since the kids have all left some time ago my husband and I have downsized a few times. I did have a space to myself but now I am a carer it is impossible to stay separate, so it is back to the head space.

    Reply
  57. I’m th eldest of five girls and the mother of four kids so I am used to creating space in my head. Since the kids have all left some time ago my husband and I have downsized a few times. I did have a space to myself but now I am a carer it is impossible to stay separate, so it is back to the head space.

    Reply
  58. I’m th eldest of five girls and the mother of four kids so I am used to creating space in my head. Since the kids have all left some time ago my husband and I have downsized a few times. I did have a space to myself but now I am a carer it is impossible to stay separate, so it is back to the head space.

    Reply
  59. I’m th eldest of five girls and the mother of four kids so I am used to creating space in my head. Since the kids have all left some time ago my husband and I have downsized a few times. I did have a space to myself but now I am a carer it is impossible to stay separate, so it is back to the head space.

    Reply
  60. I’m th eldest of five girls and the mother of four kids so I am used to creating space in my head. Since the kids have all left some time ago my husband and I have downsized a few times. I did have a space to myself but now I am a carer it is impossible to stay separate, so it is back to the head space.

    Reply
  61. Growing up, there were 5 kids (all girls) and 2 bedrooms. When we moved to the last house there was an extra big single closet in one bedroom. I put dibs on it (I was the eldest so…I was able to get the other 2 sisters to agree..ahem.)
    I made a little curtain so I could have the door open yet be “private”. I also had a battery powered lamp in there so I could sit on the floor and read, play, do whatever I wanted in my “room”. For 8 years that was my private space.
    Then off to college and I had a roommate for a couple of weeks before she moved in with her best friend. WOW!! A room to myself. What luxury.
    Then into a house with only one roommate (each with our own rooms.) That was very nice as well.
    Growing up with 4 sisters we didn’t have much “alone” time so it is something I really truly need now that I’m older.
    I love going on visits and spending time with my whole family (sisters, nieces, nephews, parents) but once I get home I need a day or 2 to decompress and be near NO ONE.
    Now it is just my husband and me and I have the dining room as “my” area. Luckily he is a very busy person and trots off hither and thither so I can get the alone time I need from time to time.

    Reply
  62. Growing up, there were 5 kids (all girls) and 2 bedrooms. When we moved to the last house there was an extra big single closet in one bedroom. I put dibs on it (I was the eldest so…I was able to get the other 2 sisters to agree..ahem.)
    I made a little curtain so I could have the door open yet be “private”. I also had a battery powered lamp in there so I could sit on the floor and read, play, do whatever I wanted in my “room”. For 8 years that was my private space.
    Then off to college and I had a roommate for a couple of weeks before she moved in with her best friend. WOW!! A room to myself. What luxury.
    Then into a house with only one roommate (each with our own rooms.) That was very nice as well.
    Growing up with 4 sisters we didn’t have much “alone” time so it is something I really truly need now that I’m older.
    I love going on visits and spending time with my whole family (sisters, nieces, nephews, parents) but once I get home I need a day or 2 to decompress and be near NO ONE.
    Now it is just my husband and me and I have the dining room as “my” area. Luckily he is a very busy person and trots off hither and thither so I can get the alone time I need from time to time.

    Reply
  63. Growing up, there were 5 kids (all girls) and 2 bedrooms. When we moved to the last house there was an extra big single closet in one bedroom. I put dibs on it (I was the eldest so…I was able to get the other 2 sisters to agree..ahem.)
    I made a little curtain so I could have the door open yet be “private”. I also had a battery powered lamp in there so I could sit on the floor and read, play, do whatever I wanted in my “room”. For 8 years that was my private space.
    Then off to college and I had a roommate for a couple of weeks before she moved in with her best friend. WOW!! A room to myself. What luxury.
    Then into a house with only one roommate (each with our own rooms.) That was very nice as well.
    Growing up with 4 sisters we didn’t have much “alone” time so it is something I really truly need now that I’m older.
    I love going on visits and spending time with my whole family (sisters, nieces, nephews, parents) but once I get home I need a day or 2 to decompress and be near NO ONE.
    Now it is just my husband and me and I have the dining room as “my” area. Luckily he is a very busy person and trots off hither and thither so I can get the alone time I need from time to time.

    Reply
  64. Growing up, there were 5 kids (all girls) and 2 bedrooms. When we moved to the last house there was an extra big single closet in one bedroom. I put dibs on it (I was the eldest so…I was able to get the other 2 sisters to agree..ahem.)
    I made a little curtain so I could have the door open yet be “private”. I also had a battery powered lamp in there so I could sit on the floor and read, play, do whatever I wanted in my “room”. For 8 years that was my private space.
    Then off to college and I had a roommate for a couple of weeks before she moved in with her best friend. WOW!! A room to myself. What luxury.
    Then into a house with only one roommate (each with our own rooms.) That was very nice as well.
    Growing up with 4 sisters we didn’t have much “alone” time so it is something I really truly need now that I’m older.
    I love going on visits and spending time with my whole family (sisters, nieces, nephews, parents) but once I get home I need a day or 2 to decompress and be near NO ONE.
    Now it is just my husband and me and I have the dining room as “my” area. Luckily he is a very busy person and trots off hither and thither so I can get the alone time I need from time to time.

    Reply
  65. Growing up, there were 5 kids (all girls) and 2 bedrooms. When we moved to the last house there was an extra big single closet in one bedroom. I put dibs on it (I was the eldest so…I was able to get the other 2 sisters to agree..ahem.)
    I made a little curtain so I could have the door open yet be “private”. I also had a battery powered lamp in there so I could sit on the floor and read, play, do whatever I wanted in my “room”. For 8 years that was my private space.
    Then off to college and I had a roommate for a couple of weeks before she moved in with her best friend. WOW!! A room to myself. What luxury.
    Then into a house with only one roommate (each with our own rooms.) That was very nice as well.
    Growing up with 4 sisters we didn’t have much “alone” time so it is something I really truly need now that I’m older.
    I love going on visits and spending time with my whole family (sisters, nieces, nephews, parents) but once I get home I need a day or 2 to decompress and be near NO ONE.
    Now it is just my husband and me and I have the dining room as “my” area. Luckily he is a very busy person and trots off hither and thither so I can get the alone time I need from time to time.

    Reply
  66. Susanna, I was the only girl in my family, so always had my own room, I was an introvert (w loved writing and drawing, even at a young age) so it was hugely important to me. It still is. I’ve had various places over the years—some just as cramped as those of your father. Now I have a large writing room, and it’s just wonderful.
    So glad your Dad has a real place to call his own. He’s a real trooper—sounds like a fabulous father in every way.

    Reply
  67. Susanna, I was the only girl in my family, so always had my own room, I was an introvert (w loved writing and drawing, even at a young age) so it was hugely important to me. It still is. I’ve had various places over the years—some just as cramped as those of your father. Now I have a large writing room, and it’s just wonderful.
    So glad your Dad has a real place to call his own. He’s a real trooper—sounds like a fabulous father in every way.

    Reply
  68. Susanna, I was the only girl in my family, so always had my own room, I was an introvert (w loved writing and drawing, even at a young age) so it was hugely important to me. It still is. I’ve had various places over the years—some just as cramped as those of your father. Now I have a large writing room, and it’s just wonderful.
    So glad your Dad has a real place to call his own. He’s a real trooper—sounds like a fabulous father in every way.

    Reply
  69. Susanna, I was the only girl in my family, so always had my own room, I was an introvert (w loved writing and drawing, even at a young age) so it was hugely important to me. It still is. I’ve had various places over the years—some just as cramped as those of your father. Now I have a large writing room, and it’s just wonderful.
    So glad your Dad has a real place to call his own. He’s a real trooper—sounds like a fabulous father in every way.

    Reply
  70. Susanna, I was the only girl in my family, so always had my own room, I was an introvert (w loved writing and drawing, even at a young age) so it was hugely important to me. It still is. I’ve had various places over the years—some just as cramped as those of your father. Now I have a large writing room, and it’s just wonderful.
    So glad your Dad has a real place to call his own. He’s a real trooper—sounds like a fabulous father in every way.

    Reply
  71. Your dad sounds wonderful. My dad was a super extrovert, and very gregarious, but even he had his basement to putter around in, so that was definitely his space. I was lucky enough to have my own bedroom from the age of around 10 on.

    Reply
  72. Your dad sounds wonderful. My dad was a super extrovert, and very gregarious, but even he had his basement to putter around in, so that was definitely his space. I was lucky enough to have my own bedroom from the age of around 10 on.

    Reply
  73. Your dad sounds wonderful. My dad was a super extrovert, and very gregarious, but even he had his basement to putter around in, so that was definitely his space. I was lucky enough to have my own bedroom from the age of around 10 on.

    Reply
  74. Your dad sounds wonderful. My dad was a super extrovert, and very gregarious, but even he had his basement to putter around in, so that was definitely his space. I was lucky enough to have my own bedroom from the age of around 10 on.

    Reply
  75. Your dad sounds wonderful. My dad was a super extrovert, and very gregarious, but even he had his basement to putter around in, so that was definitely his space. I was lucky enough to have my own bedroom from the age of around 10 on.

    Reply
  76. She is 4 years older than I but with 5 kids and a limited budget, believe me, kids will be sharing rooms and beds if necessary! My boys had their own rooms until we bought our second place and it only had 2 bedrooms. They shared until one moved out – strangely enough, it was the youngest who moved out first! 🙂

    Reply
  77. She is 4 years older than I but with 5 kids and a limited budget, believe me, kids will be sharing rooms and beds if necessary! My boys had their own rooms until we bought our second place and it only had 2 bedrooms. They shared until one moved out – strangely enough, it was the youngest who moved out first! 🙂

    Reply
  78. She is 4 years older than I but with 5 kids and a limited budget, believe me, kids will be sharing rooms and beds if necessary! My boys had their own rooms until we bought our second place and it only had 2 bedrooms. They shared until one moved out – strangely enough, it was the youngest who moved out first! 🙂

    Reply
  79. She is 4 years older than I but with 5 kids and a limited budget, believe me, kids will be sharing rooms and beds if necessary! My boys had their own rooms until we bought our second place and it only had 2 bedrooms. They shared until one moved out – strangely enough, it was the youngest who moved out first! 🙂

    Reply
  80. She is 4 years older than I but with 5 kids and a limited budget, believe me, kids will be sharing rooms and beds if necessary! My boys had their own rooms until we bought our second place and it only had 2 bedrooms. They shared until one moved out – strangely enough, it was the youngest who moved out first! 🙂

    Reply
  81. When I was growing up, I did have my own spaces in the house. My sister and I had a good relationship, so even when we shared a room, we each had our own portions of the room.
    But all my life long (even before I could read), my most private space has been between the covers of a book. I used to look in my beautiful picture books and tell myself the stories or poems that went with the pictures. And I would take a book to my mother or father, and ask them to read me a specific story, based on those pictures.

    Reply
  82. When I was growing up, I did have my own spaces in the house. My sister and I had a good relationship, so even when we shared a room, we each had our own portions of the room.
    But all my life long (even before I could read), my most private space has been between the covers of a book. I used to look in my beautiful picture books and tell myself the stories or poems that went with the pictures. And I would take a book to my mother or father, and ask them to read me a specific story, based on those pictures.

    Reply
  83. When I was growing up, I did have my own spaces in the house. My sister and I had a good relationship, so even when we shared a room, we each had our own portions of the room.
    But all my life long (even before I could read), my most private space has been between the covers of a book. I used to look in my beautiful picture books and tell myself the stories or poems that went with the pictures. And I would take a book to my mother or father, and ask them to read me a specific story, based on those pictures.

    Reply
  84. When I was growing up, I did have my own spaces in the house. My sister and I had a good relationship, so even when we shared a room, we each had our own portions of the room.
    But all my life long (even before I could read), my most private space has been between the covers of a book. I used to look in my beautiful picture books and tell myself the stories or poems that went with the pictures. And I would take a book to my mother or father, and ask them to read me a specific story, based on those pictures.

    Reply
  85. When I was growing up, I did have my own spaces in the house. My sister and I had a good relationship, so even when we shared a room, we each had our own portions of the room.
    But all my life long (even before I could read), my most private space has been between the covers of a book. I used to look in my beautiful picture books and tell myself the stories or poems that went with the pictures. And I would take a book to my mother or father, and ask them to read me a specific story, based on those pictures.

    Reply
  86. It’s an odd thing, but as far as I can remember, nobody at home ever read me a story as a child. I was preceded by four boys so perhaps my mom was too exhausted to even think about it, and I am sure such things never crossed my dad’s radar when he was around. That is why I was so eager to learn to read — I knew there were stories in those books that went with those pictures, and I had to find out how to get at them by myself. Which I did.
    Ever after that, reading was my refuge. I carried a book with me wherever I went and I had my nose in it at every opportunity. Nobody bothered my books; they weren’t interested. I had a room of my own by the time I was five or six and I kept my treasures there.
    When I got my first apartment, I thought that was so great. I’d have more room for books. When I bought my own place, I made sure there was plenty of shelf room.
    The great thing about owning my own place, though, was the secure escape from the world. After I paid off my mortgage, even the Bank couldn’t tell me to get out. In those early days I would come home from work, close the front door, lock it again, lean back against it and absorb the peace and quiet. Nobody bursting through my office door with complaints, crises and demands. No fights to settle, no bosses to manage, no coworkers to defend or nag into meeting deadlines. Nothing. Just a cat, a sofa, a diet coke and a really good book. Paradise. My own recharging station 🙂

    Reply
  87. It’s an odd thing, but as far as I can remember, nobody at home ever read me a story as a child. I was preceded by four boys so perhaps my mom was too exhausted to even think about it, and I am sure such things never crossed my dad’s radar when he was around. That is why I was so eager to learn to read — I knew there were stories in those books that went with those pictures, and I had to find out how to get at them by myself. Which I did.
    Ever after that, reading was my refuge. I carried a book with me wherever I went and I had my nose in it at every opportunity. Nobody bothered my books; they weren’t interested. I had a room of my own by the time I was five or six and I kept my treasures there.
    When I got my first apartment, I thought that was so great. I’d have more room for books. When I bought my own place, I made sure there was plenty of shelf room.
    The great thing about owning my own place, though, was the secure escape from the world. After I paid off my mortgage, even the Bank couldn’t tell me to get out. In those early days I would come home from work, close the front door, lock it again, lean back against it and absorb the peace and quiet. Nobody bursting through my office door with complaints, crises and demands. No fights to settle, no bosses to manage, no coworkers to defend or nag into meeting deadlines. Nothing. Just a cat, a sofa, a diet coke and a really good book. Paradise. My own recharging station 🙂

    Reply
  88. It’s an odd thing, but as far as I can remember, nobody at home ever read me a story as a child. I was preceded by four boys so perhaps my mom was too exhausted to even think about it, and I am sure such things never crossed my dad’s radar when he was around. That is why I was so eager to learn to read — I knew there were stories in those books that went with those pictures, and I had to find out how to get at them by myself. Which I did.
    Ever after that, reading was my refuge. I carried a book with me wherever I went and I had my nose in it at every opportunity. Nobody bothered my books; they weren’t interested. I had a room of my own by the time I was five or six and I kept my treasures there.
    When I got my first apartment, I thought that was so great. I’d have more room for books. When I bought my own place, I made sure there was plenty of shelf room.
    The great thing about owning my own place, though, was the secure escape from the world. After I paid off my mortgage, even the Bank couldn’t tell me to get out. In those early days I would come home from work, close the front door, lock it again, lean back against it and absorb the peace and quiet. Nobody bursting through my office door with complaints, crises and demands. No fights to settle, no bosses to manage, no coworkers to defend or nag into meeting deadlines. Nothing. Just a cat, a sofa, a diet coke and a really good book. Paradise. My own recharging station 🙂

    Reply
  89. It’s an odd thing, but as far as I can remember, nobody at home ever read me a story as a child. I was preceded by four boys so perhaps my mom was too exhausted to even think about it, and I am sure such things never crossed my dad’s radar when he was around. That is why I was so eager to learn to read — I knew there were stories in those books that went with those pictures, and I had to find out how to get at them by myself. Which I did.
    Ever after that, reading was my refuge. I carried a book with me wherever I went and I had my nose in it at every opportunity. Nobody bothered my books; they weren’t interested. I had a room of my own by the time I was five or six and I kept my treasures there.
    When I got my first apartment, I thought that was so great. I’d have more room for books. When I bought my own place, I made sure there was plenty of shelf room.
    The great thing about owning my own place, though, was the secure escape from the world. After I paid off my mortgage, even the Bank couldn’t tell me to get out. In those early days I would come home from work, close the front door, lock it again, lean back against it and absorb the peace and quiet. Nobody bursting through my office door with complaints, crises and demands. No fights to settle, no bosses to manage, no coworkers to defend or nag into meeting deadlines. Nothing. Just a cat, a sofa, a diet coke and a really good book. Paradise. My own recharging station 🙂

    Reply
  90. It’s an odd thing, but as far as I can remember, nobody at home ever read me a story as a child. I was preceded by four boys so perhaps my mom was too exhausted to even think about it, and I am sure such things never crossed my dad’s radar when he was around. That is why I was so eager to learn to read — I knew there were stories in those books that went with those pictures, and I had to find out how to get at them by myself. Which I did.
    Ever after that, reading was my refuge. I carried a book with me wherever I went and I had my nose in it at every opportunity. Nobody bothered my books; they weren’t interested. I had a room of my own by the time I was five or six and I kept my treasures there.
    When I got my first apartment, I thought that was so great. I’d have more room for books. When I bought my own place, I made sure there was plenty of shelf room.
    The great thing about owning my own place, though, was the secure escape from the world. After I paid off my mortgage, even the Bank couldn’t tell me to get out. In those early days I would come home from work, close the front door, lock it again, lean back against it and absorb the peace and quiet. Nobody bursting through my office door with complaints, crises and demands. No fights to settle, no bosses to manage, no coworkers to defend or nag into meeting deadlines. Nothing. Just a cat, a sofa, a diet coke and a really good book. Paradise. My own recharging station 🙂

    Reply

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