Christina here. I’ve been thinking about so called “hen lit” recently, as I read some books that could be put in that category. It’s usually defined as stories with older heroines, and Wikipedia also calls it “matron lit”, a term I vehemently dislike! I mean, just because you’ve hit a certain age doesn’t mean you automatically turn into a “matron”, does it? I’m of the mindset of the poem Warning by Jenny Joseph, about breaking the rules when you get old, wearing purple and doing things you shouldn’t just because you can – that is the way I want to age, not conforming to any mould.
What do we consider an older heroine? I’m guessing women from the age of about forty/forty-five and upwards, although to me forty now seems fairly young. (Yes, I’m already that old!) It’s all very subjective, but the actual age doesn’t really matter – it’s the fact that they are not pretty young things any more, waiting for their big love story and Happy-Ever-After with a gorgeous man, two point five children, and a lovely house with a picket fence. Instead they are older and (hopefully) wiser than the average romance heroine, and may already have been there and done that. Also got the T-shirt and discarded it.
In fact, most of these characters have already been married and had a family. Perhaps their children have just left home so they’re empty-nesters, or maybe they have recently been divorced when their husband had a mid-life crisis and traded her in for a much younger model, thus denting her confidence. Both of those things can cause a lot of upheaval and self-reflection, which makes for good stories. They are also a chance to start again, reinvent yourself and figure out what you really want from the rest of your life. Not to mention find a partner who appreciates you just the way you are.
I don’t mind what age the protagonists are in the romances I read, but if they’re older, I do want them to end up with their HEA with a man the reader can trust isn’t going to rush off the minute some nubile 30-something decides they fancy him. The heroine needs to find a deeper, more satisfying love than the one(s) she’s had in the past, drawing on her own life experiences to see that this time it’s real.
Having said that, I still prefer to read about younger heroines who have their whole lives in front of them. There are so many more possibilities in store for them, things an older heroine has already been through, the main one being having children. If she is forty-five or over, the chances of her becoming a mother (again in some cases) are pretty slim. What if she and the new hero really want a family? If so, we already know they’re in for heartbreak because it’s not going to happen, whereas with a younger heroine it could, even if it doesn’t necessarily do so.
One book I read recently had a heroine who’d been in a long relationship with a man who refused to have kids with her, even though it was her dearest wish. She finally ditched him, only to find out he’d made his new girlfriend pregnant within months of meeting her. The heroine is by that stage aged 42 and could potentially have a baby. (I know someone who had kids at age 41 and 43 without any problems). Yet although the author gives this heroine a second chance at love with a wonderful man, she doesn’t let her get pregnant. That made me so sad and I somehow felt cheated! I would have preferred to leave the couple at the end with the hope that she might have a baby, rather than finding out in a sequel that it didn’t happen for them.
There was the consolation of a “bonus” child, ie the hero already had a daughter with a previous wife and the heroine becomes the girl’s mother to all intents and purposes. They have a very close relationship and love each other. For some readers, that might be enough, but it wasn’t for me. I know the definition of “family” can be very loose, and sometimes we choose who we want to consider as family members. These chosen ones can often be more wonderful than actual blood relatives, and adopted children are of course loved just as much as those you’ve given birth to because they are wanted and longed for. That’s lovely. Yet I prefer stories where there is still hope for the heroine to have what her heart desires, her own baby.
There is, of course, the opposite end of the scale where the heroines are very young. Sometimes too young. However, this is usually in historical romances, where we have to remember that people were considered adults at a much earlier age because life in general was shorter. Some readers object to heroines who are eighteen (or even younger occasionally even though it’s not a YA book), but to me what matters is their maturity level. For example, if they’ve had a tough upbringing, they might be as ready for love and marriage as someone much older.
Georgette Heyer often has older heroines – although her definition of old is what was considered so during Regency times. A woman who hadn’t found a husband after three or four seasons in London could be “on the shelf” even though she might only be 23 or 24. That seems a bit silly to us, but to them it would have been a serious matter. Either way, I love Heyer’s older heroines because they are usually very sharp and intelligent, with a wonderful sense of humour, and they are very pragmatic and resourceful. They don’t expect romance, and when they get it, it is therefore doubly satisfying for both them and the reader. Contrast that with some of the “schoolroom misses” who are having their first season, and I know which one I prefer.
As I said, it’s all subjective, and we each have our favourites.
What is your view on older heroines – love them or loathe them? Do you perhaps want to see MORE older heroines in books? And what are the pros and cons?
I’m neither pro nor con. I do appreciate older heroines more now that I am older myself. Regardless of the age, it all comes down to how good the story is. I’m not a fan of heroines who are too young or immature. I like them to be old enough to have a little common sense.
My favourite Heyers have slightly older heroines: Abby in Black Sheep, Ancilla in The Nonesuch, and Frederica.
That is very true, Mary, the story is crucial. And yes, a heroine definitely needs to have common sense otherwise we’ll quickly lose patience with her!
Yes to all of those! I love her older heroines, especially the ones who are not afraid to say what they think and stand up for themselves. Brilliant!
I enjoy seeing older heroines in novels. Last year, I read Deanna Raybourn’s “Killers of a Certain Age”, about older secret agents in the US who came out of retirement to go after someone from the past who wanted them dead.
I’ve read all of Georgette Heyer’s Regency novels, and the older women have a gravitas about them that a younger woman cannot radiate.
That sounds like an intriguing story, Patricia! There was a film a while back that was similar – “Red” – about a bunch of retired spies who come back and get together for a mission. It starred Helen Mirren and Bruce Willis among others. Great fun!
https://www.imdb.com/title/tt1245526/
I don’t much want heroines who are my age, though I do appreciate the occasional acerbic grandmother, but I want them to behave like adults. I’d rather a mature 18-year-old than an idiotically unrealistic 30-year-old.
I’ve always wondered where Heyer got that notion that a woman was on the shelf at 22. That was the average age for upper class women to marry in the late 18th century. In an entirely unscientific study, I once wandered through the peerage.com, checking marriage dates in the Regency period and could find very few teenage marriages. Was it different in Heyer’s youth?
M.C.Beaton’s (written as Marion Chesney) Lady Fortescue, and really all the Poor Relations series should be included.
That’s an interesting question, Lillian, as Ms Heyer usually did very thorough research for her stories. She must have read it somewhere. Perhaps Jennifer Kloesters might know more? She’s an authority on Heyer. As regards 18 vs 30 year olds, I totally agree – it’s the maturity level that counts.
Thank you, Janet! It’s been a while since I read Ms Chesney’s books.
Lillian, don’t forget she was writing about aristocratic young women. I’m sure it was quite common for ordinary women to marry a bit older, perhaps because it was difficult for a dowerless woman to find a husband.
That’s a very good point, Anne – girls without a dowry (those working as maids for example) had to save up for years in order to be able to afford to get married. So maybe it must have been an aristocratic thing and since they “launched” young girls into society at age 17 or 18, by the time they were 23/24 they would have seemed old if they hadn’t caught a husband.
No, the statistics I saw said that the 22+ for women was middle and upper classes. It dropped during the later 19th century.
OK many thanks, Lillian, that is very interesting!
I love older heroes and heroines. There are so many more storylines that work better with them rather the one’s you’d use for a debutante.
Thank you for a thought provoking post, Christina.
I enjoy reading good stories with heroines of all ages. For me, it’s more about the story than the ages of the main characters.
I recently liked Role Playing by Cathy Yardley which has a 48 year old heroine. I also enjoyed Lucky by GiGi DeGraham whose heroine was 18 as were the two heroes.
Thank you for the stimulating post, Christina. I love stories with older heroines but I’ve also got favorites with younger heroines. Speaking of Georgette Heyer one of my favorites in The Corinthian…very young heroine. I think Frederica is my all time favorite and just recently enjoyed a newer released audio version (thank goodness) making me happy because I wasn’t fond of the old version I already had.
Like many have said it depends on the story. Anna Campbell’s heroines are almost all older, as are Grace Burrowes’. My interpretation of the drive to marry off daughters at an early age was that the competition was stiff then (the wars?,) that parents were worried about getting stuck with supporting a spinster daughter or worrying about her future when they were gone, and lastly, that at 22+ the ‘bloom’ might already be fading from the rose. That youthful glow, without makeup which was frowned upon?
The link to that Frederica audio is: https://www.audible.com/pd/Frederica-Audiobook/1473591694?qid=1697929653&sr=1-3&ref_pageloadid=z51WeSamqtkIFjmq&ref=a_search_c3_lProduct_1_3&pf_rd_p=83218cca-c308-412f-bfcf-90198b687a2f&pf_rd_r=0HZX1GTGMAD4PFX49S3X&pageLoadId=QUvt2GBLnaZygPJZ&ref_plink=not_applicable&creativeId=0d6f6720-f41c-457e-a42b-8c8dceb62f2c
I guess it’s the fact that they have more life experience, Pamela, and are older and wiser!
Thanks, Kareni! You’re right, the story has to be right no matter the heroine’s age. And thank you for the recommendations – will look those up!
Thank you, Michelle, so glad you enjoyed it! Frederica is wonderful, isn’t it? Definitely one of my favourites too. Maybe you’re right about the fact there was a lot of competition in the ton – there definitely weren’t as many dukes and earls as there is in fiction, never mind eligible young men 🙂
Many thanks, Michelle!
I agree that young ladies are more appealing with maturity. I do really like older/mature heroines whether she is a spinster or widow. A second chance romance.
I also like an older woman and a younger man romance.
It seems most of us agree, Margaret – we want a bit of maturity in our heroines! And yes, I really like second chance romances as well.
Thanks for this terrific post. I do not have a lot of interest in reading about very young heroines. But, you are correct, people were considered mature at a younger age in earlier times. In fact, people were considered to be responsible adults at what we consider very young ages.
For me, I want a well written story. I want to read about interesting characters who would be people who would interest me in real life. I want to read about interesting events. In short, I want a good book to read. I’m funny that way.
I think you’re absolutely right, Annette, and having a really good story is the most important thing. The heroine has to be someone we empathise with so it depends on her character, rather than her age, whether we do or not. I’m glad you enjoyed the post – thank you!